Print Page - FUNNY SMS

Entertainment => SMS & QUOTES => Topic started by: RemO on October 22, 2011, 06:51:30 PM

Title: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 22, 2011, 06:51:30 PM

Ponnugala entha alavuku love pannanum theriyuma..?
Naama avala love panratha parthu ava friend
Namaloda odi varanum

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 22, 2011, 06:53:01 PM

“If the first button in a shirt is put wrong,
Then every button will be wrong”
- Great lines by tailor Gobalu ,Elathukume Shakespeare’a ethir partha epadi :D

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 22, 2011, 06:55:35 PM

Funny sentence written on the T-Shirt of a
Beautiful girl walking on side of the road.
“U r not looking at the road right now, be careful…”

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 23, 2011, 10:42:23 AM

What is the height of Flirting?
When your love letter starts with
"TO WHOMSOEVER IT MAY CONCERN".

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 23, 2011, 10:46:13 AM

I want u ...
To be with me In a nice Restaurent
To have candle light dinner.... &
to say those sweet three words to U....
"Pay The Bill"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 24, 2011, 08:45:04 AM

10 yrs income,

Teacher - 20 lakh
Doctor - 50 lakh
Engineer - 45 lakh
IAS - 70 lakh

Sanyasi ( Ramdev) - 1177 Cr
Sai baba - 40000 Cr
Nithyanantha - 2000 Cr

So chose ur career properly

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 24, 2011, 08:59:35 AM

6 birds were sitting in a tree
A man ready 2 shoot,
5 birds fly away
but 1 bird was sitting
why?

koluppu, vera onum ila:-)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 28, 2011, 06:34:48 PM

HAIKOO:

Irutil iruntha unnai Velichathirku kondu vandhen,

Aanal neeyo en peyarai vaithu kindal seikirai.

By
"TUBE LIGHT"
Gud night

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 28, 2011, 06:55:57 PM

Neengal parthu kondiruppathu

ungaloda tappa cellathan..pinna ithula sun tvya theriyum?

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 28, 2011, 06:57:00 PM

Unna Paakama Iruka Mudiyala Da!
Ethai Paathalum Unna Maadhiriye Theriuthu.
Ipa Kooda Oru
Eruma Maada Paarthen.

Adhu Nee thaanu Ninachu HAI Sollitean. Gud MorninG!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 28, 2011, 06:58:02 PM

Tragedy Love:

Unn Sirippil Sidhariya Thanga Kaasugalai Saerthu Vaithaen. Kadeisiyil Adhu Tasmac'il Sarakku Vanga Kooda Sellupadi Aaga Villai.

Good Night!!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 28, 2011, 06:59:22 PM

Naethu bu'sla poyittu irunthappa,

Oruththar shoulder'la adichhu, "Thenampettai'ya"nnu kaettara.

Naan illa en "tholpatta" nu sonnen.

Aana yaen ennai murachcharunnu theriyala!
--------
MORAL:
"Kandadhai Thindral Kundan Aavai, Kandadhaiyum Padicha Buthisaali Aavai.."
Good N8!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 28, 2011, 07:02:08 PM

Excuse me
intha address yenka irukku'nu theryuma?

Mr.NAPOLEAN,
door.no.5000,
WILLS Apartment,
OLD MONK Colony,
BLACK KNIGHT Nagar,
MANIKCHANDPURAM,
TASMAC NADU

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 28, 2011, 07:04:25 PM

EXAM CENTRE:

BOY to GIRL "All the Best"

GIRL to BOY "All the Best"

Result:
Girl - 80 marks
Boy - FAIL

MORAL: Nallavanga Vaakku mattum thaan palikkum

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 28, 2011, 07:10:42 PM

IAS

IAS

IAS

IAS

IAS

IAS

IAS

APPADA,ORU VALIYA KASHTAPATTU UNNA IAS PADIKKA VACHITAN. PUDIKKALAN'NA SOLLU , NAALAIKKU 'MBBS' PDIKKA VAIKIREN.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 28, 2011, 07:18:29 PM

eendra pozhudhilum peradha thalatai oru physics periodil peruvathe sirappu.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 28, 2011, 07:20:14 PM

Mr.Bean Friend: Ethuku da sugar dappala"MASALA' nu elthi vatchu iruka?

Mr.Bean : Erumba Yematha thaan....!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 28, 2011, 07:23:47 PM

Sorakkai-Mummy
Poosanee-Daddy
Thengai-Elder Brother
Vengayam-Enger Brother
Thakkali-Elder Sister
Perungayam-Enger Sister
Vazayai Palam-Friends
Maanga-You

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 28, 2011, 07:25:42 PM

Teacher: Araiyai kaalaal perukkinaal enna varum?
Student: Kaal'la ratham varum sir.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 28, 2011, 07:26:34 PM

Teacher:
Idhu varaikkum nadathi mudicha paadathula edhavadhu doubt irundha kelunga.
Student:
Neenga Maths teacher'ra illa English teacher'ra sir?

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 28, 2011, 07:27:18 PM

Intha Naal Unnoda Calendarla Kurichi Vachikko,
Ennoda Carda Recharge Panni,
Unnaivida Athigama Sms Anuppi,
Nee Epdi Enakku Tholla Kudutheyo,
Adhae Madtheri Nanum Kudukkala,
Nan "Un Friend" Illa...
2+2+2=8 Kootti Kalichu Paru
Kanaku Thappa Varum.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 28, 2011, 07:28:49 PM

Vaarthai thadumara karanam:
Kangal!
Valzkai thadumara karanam:
Pengal!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 28, 2011, 07:31:53 PM

Ordinary koli'kku ethanna kaal?
2 is the wrong answer!
The correct answer is 10.
Because:
Aadu(4) + Nari(4) + Koli(2) = 10

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 28, 2011, 07:33:59 PM

Gowndamani: Naan ungita ennada vaangittu vara sonnaen?
Senthil: tube light vaangittu vara soneenga
Goundamani: ethana?
Senthil: rendu
Goundamani: onnu inga irruku, innonu enga da?
Senthil: innonu thaanne sms padikudhu....

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 28, 2011, 07:39:37 PM

SMS Sangathaar Gavanathirkku :
Vilaivaasi eatrathin kaaranamaga,
Reply Anupum Anbargaluku Mattume Ini SMS Anupa Padum!
Ithu Sangatharin Arivippu...
(Kavalai padatheenga, sangathukku theriyama ungalukku mattum anuppurean)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: maha on October 29, 2011, 08:43:51 PM

;D ;D ;D ;D 8)....

city oram...
rathiri neram...
mudivu panrom
vediya vediya pinrom
thuni manigal
uruthum
Naigal thurathum
kaka nari wedding
VA QUATER CUTTING!
( spl dedicated to remo )

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 30, 2011, 09:06:42 AM

Bayam than tholviku mukiya karanam so,
Inimel

Adikadi

Kannadiya parkathinga

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 30, 2011, 09:07:59 AM

2011 girls…
Husband: Oru cup coffee.
Wife: Enna da keta??
Husband: tharatumanu keten..

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 30, 2011, 09:09:11 AM

Kedachuruchu!
Kedachuruchu!

Kedachuruchu!

Kedachuruchu!

Nan anupura sms ah padikkaa oru Loosu
Kedachuruchu!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 30, 2011, 09:10:30 AM

Ration la
Free rice vaangi,
Free grinder la maavaraichu,
Free gas stove la idli suttu,
Free mixi la chatni arachi,
Free Fan ah pottu ,
Free TV ya paarthukittey,
Free concrete veetla sugama irukkalam.
Disease vantha
Free medical
Child ku
Free education,
Kalyanam panna 25000+ thaalikku 4 gram Free gold
Delivery ku 20000.
Old age pension,
Free bus pass
Ellamey free ah kodutha
Appuram ennathuku nan padikkanum
Velaiku pokanum???

Vaazhga Tamilakam

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 30, 2011, 09:11:47 AM

Theriyatha kaatrum ,
Puriyatha kavithaiyum
Sollatha kaadhalum
Kalaiyatha kanavum

Kulikkatha neeyum

Endrum “alagu” than

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 30, 2011, 09:12:42 AM

Nee nethu SMS anupalanu naa tea kuda kudikala…
And sogathula oru…

8 poori
6 idli
3 chappathi sapitu
2 tumblar milk kudichutu
Patiniya irunthen.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 30, 2011, 09:18:58 AM

Scientists all over the world r
Wondering how long a human being
Can live without brain….
So, kindly tell them ur age pls

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on October 30, 2011, 09:19:44 AM

Who said milkl gives u strength??
Drink 3 glasses of milk and move a wall, u can’t
But drink 3 glasses of whiskey and see- the wall moves on its own.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 02, 2011, 05:40:17 AM

A Question Asked In A Talent Test

If U R Married To One Of The Twin Sisters,
How Would You Recognize Your Wife?

The Answer Came:

"Why Should I ? :-P

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 02, 2011, 05:40:54 AM

There are Two Ways To Rule a Girl / Women
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
And nobody knows them.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 02, 2011, 05:41:21 AM

boy: how do i play the guitar????
girl: u should be on TV for ur talent :|
boy: am i so good??? :D :O

girl: if u were on TV,, i can atleast switch it off ;/

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 02, 2011, 05:41:49 AM

A Poetry Competition asked For A 2-Line
Rhyme With d Most Romantic 1st Line &
the Least Romantic 2nd Line

There's d Winning Rhymes

My darling, My Love,My Beautiful Wife
Marrying U Ruined,My Whole Life

I c Ur Face When I m Dreaming
That's Why I Always Wake Up Screaming

Kind Intelligent, Loving & Hot
This Describes Everything You r Not

I Love Ur Smile, Ur Face & Ur Eyes
Damn, I'm V Good At Telling Lies

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 02, 2011, 05:42:17 AM

A Journey Of A Thousand
Miles Begins With A Single Step.

Then,
You Get In A Car
And Go To The Airport.

It Doesn't Take That Long :p

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 02, 2011, 05:42:42 AM

Sunglasses:
Allowing You To Stare At
People Without Getting
Caught.
It's Like Facebook In Real Life.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 02, 2011, 05:43:13 AM

Girl : I'm warning you
My Mummy is coming back in half an hour..

Boy : But I'm not doing anything..
Girl : That's why I'm warning you..

Hurry up ! :D :D

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Swetha on November 02, 2011, 09:45:14 PM

Exam enbadhu college figure madri.
College mudiyura varaikum than irukum.

But

Arrear enbadu mamaponnu madri.
Sirukki Mava!
nammalaye suthi suthi varuval...!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Swetha on November 02, 2011, 09:47:07 PM

while take off we call it aeroplane,
but
when its landing why don't we say it as erangoplane??

By
English improvement society ...

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 07, 2011, 02:39:31 AM

Choosing Career Is Like
Chosing A Wife From 10 Girls.

Even If You Pick The Most Beautiful,
Intelligent, Kindest Woman,
There's Still Pain Of Losing The Other 9 :p

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 07, 2011, 02:40:04 AM

Lady On Fone
Hi Sir, I want To Meet & Talk To u.
U Are The father Of 1 Of My Kids.

Man Stunnd,Omg!
R U Riya
No

Anu?
No

Pari?
No

Jasi?
No

Lady in confusion

No Sir I am The Class Teacher
Of Ur Son.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 07, 2011, 02:40:47 AM

This is Student Life Definitions Altered :D

SPEED : Getting ready in 5 minutes
SHARING : Whole class copying one assignment but in totally different way
PRESENTATION SKILLS : Can present one answer in 5 different ways for 5 different questions :D
EDITING : Your report contains atleast 5 pages less than the person from whom you copied
MULTI TASKING: Playing games on cell, sms to gf/bf, gossiping with seat mate, day dreaming, making teacher's sketch and still pretending that you are listening what teacher is saying.

ART : Beautiful art on the last page of note book.
SENSE OF HUMOR : Provide best unintentional humour to teachers during Viva :D
CONSISTENCY : Once a Zero, always a Zero!
VOICE MODULATION : Attendance in 5 different voices.
STAMINA : Tolerating teacher for consecutive 1 hour :D
PERIPHERAL VISION: Staring at your crush, no matter where so ever he/she sits :D
HUMANITY : Failing and keeping the consistency of giving others a chance to top! :D
TALENT : Make whole class laugh no matter how tense is the situation :P :D

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 07, 2011, 02:41:23 AM

girl: hi baby! :)
boy: hi my lovely..
(sending failed)

girl: are u there??
boy: yes ! yes i am here!
(sending failed)

girl: are u ignoring me or what ???
boy: honey im not.... im here..
(sending failed)

girl: ok! it's over; dont u ever talk to me again!
boy: DAMN! go to hell ! >_<
.
.
(message sent) :P :D

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 07, 2011, 02:41:52 AM

What is the perfect example
of both Good & Bad Luck?

The naughty wind blows the girl's skirt high (Good luck)

but at the same time

Dust falls into the boy's eyes (Bad luck)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 07, 2011, 02:42:27 AM

Students Vs Teachers :-

When We are in Class. We Are Students.
When they are in class They are Scholars.

When v Correct our Writing its Overwriting.
When they Correct their, its Correction,

When v copy from Others, We are Cheaters,
When they Copy they Quote

When We don't do our work in time, We are Sluggish,
When they don't do, they are Busy,

When We Joke in class, We are Jokers,
When They are joke, They r Witty :P

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 07, 2011, 02:42:51 AM

C H I L D H O O D
Is Like Being
D R U N K . . .
Everyone Remembers
What You Did,
Except You ..

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 07, 2011, 02:43:21 AM

A Girl Checks Her Weight = 58kg .
Removes Sandal = 56.
Then Dupatta = 52
Now Coins Finished.......
.
.
.
.
A Boy In A Q Behind Her
Said
Ü Carry On"",
I Have Coins!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on November 08, 2011, 10:07:34 PM

Shortest jokes:
2 women r sitting quiet.
2 cracks r playing chess
Girlfriend pays the bill

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on November 09, 2011, 11:19:01 PM

Thinam oru kural

Indraya kural:

“Uoooooo””Uooooo”
Ithu nariyoda kural…!
Naalaiku vera oru kural kekalaam .. ok…

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on November 09, 2011, 11:33:27 PM

A girl proposed to me and I reply

“ sorry I wont accept ur proposal
But I appreciate ur selection

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on November 09, 2011, 11:39:08 PM

Words written above a classroom clock,
This clock will never b stolen,
Coz too many students r watching it..!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on November 09, 2011, 11:40:13 PM

2 guys were following 2 girls
Both girls took rakhi & tied to their hands
1st guy to second – what will we do now??
2nd guy- u marry my sis , I will marry ur sis.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on November 09, 2011, 11:41:39 PM

Choosing career is like choosing a wife from 10 girls. Even if u pick the most beautiful, intelligent, kindest woman
There’s still pain of losing others

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on November 09, 2011, 11:43:19 PM

Boy: How do I play the guitar???
Girl: u should be on TV for ur talent
Boy : am I so good??
Girl: if u were on Tv I can at least switch it off

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on November 09, 2011, 11:45:40 PM

“ Unforgettable 3 things in our life”
!
!
!
!
!
!
!
!
!
!
1. Breakfast
2.lunch
3. DINNER

Ella tim emotional aga vendiya avasiyam ila

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: ஸ்ருதி on November 11, 2011, 07:34:57 AM

(https://friendstamilchat.in/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fakmedia.allykatzz.net%2Fupload%2F00%2F776274897728173.jpg&hash=9742dd11260995122f4521e49ab55302a3e03b03)
ஒரு பொண்ணு வாந்தி எடுத்தால் பெற்றோர் சொல்லுவீனம் 'யார் அந்த பரதேசி நாய்??'
ஒரு பையன் வாந்தி எடுத்தால் பெற்றோர் சொல்லுவீனம் 'பரதேசி நாயே குடிச்சிட்டு வந்து வாந்தி எடுக்கிறியே!!!'

தத்துவம்.::: யார் வாந்தி எடுத்தாலும் பையனுகளுக்கு தான் கெட்ட பெயர்..

Title: FUNNY
Post by: micro diary on November 16, 2011, 02:33:26 PM

Vimanaththkku 'MEENAMPAKKAM'
kappalukku 'PADDINAPAKKAM'
rainukku 'NUNKAMPAKKAM'
eanakku 'KODAMPAKKAM'
unakku ' KEELPAKKAM'

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 17, 2011, 06:11:54 PM

Height of coolness:
2 Guys coming out of the examination Hall with chips and coke in hands....
1st guy:which paper was it?
2nd guy:I think maths......
1st guy:(surprisingly) you read the question paper?
2nd guy: no I see a girl sitting besides me using calculator:>

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 17, 2011, 06:12:32 PM

Perfect example of confidence:
A junior in an office dialed his boss's number by mistake & said :
Hey, send a coffee in my cabin in two minutes !...........boss shouted : do you know whom you're talking to ?!!!!!!
Junior : no!
Boss: i'm the boss of this office.
Junior (in the same tone) : & do u know whom you're talking to?
Boss: no!
Junior: thank God. (and disconnected da phone).....:d :p

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 17, 2011, 06:12:59 PM

Sardar sent SMS to his BOSS:
"Me sick, no work"
Boss SMS back:
"When I am sick I kiss my wife try it"
2 hours later sardar sms 2 boss:
"Me ok, ur wife very sweet"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 17, 2011, 06:13:34 PM

I Wonder If 1 Day
Somebody Will Ever Come
N
Knock 0n My Door
N
Tell Me
"Hey , V Have 7 Mutual Friends
In FACEBOOK "
Can I Come In ... =P =D

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 17, 2011, 06:14:08 PM

When A Girl
Accepts Your Friend Request It Means She
Accepted Your “Friendship” Not Your
“Proposal”,
When A Girl Sends You A Friend Request It
Means She Wants To Be Your Friend Not Your
Girlfriend,
When She Tag You It Means She Wants To
Share Her Thoughts With You And Not That
She’s Lost In Your Thoughts,
When She Comments On Your Status It Meams
She’s Just Being Social And Not Flirting,
When She Like Your Comment It Means She
Like Your Comment Not You

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 17, 2011, 06:14:38 PM

Girls are like phones.
We like to be held
and talked too-
but if u press the
wrong button
u'll be disconnected!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 17, 2011, 06:15:04 PM

An Angry Wife To
Her Husband 0n Phone:
"Where d Hell Are You ... ?"

Husband:
Darling You Remember That
Jewelery Shop Where You Saw
The Diamond Necklace n Totally
Fell In Love With It n I Didn't
Have Money That Time n I said
"Baby It'll Be Yours 1 Day ... " O:)

Wife, With A Smile & Blushing:
Yeah I Remember That My Love !

Husband:
I m In The Pub Just Next To That Shop

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 17, 2011, 06:15:34 PM

An Airline Introduced
A Special Package For Business Men.
Buy Ur Ticket Get Ur Wife's Ticket Free

After Great Success,
The Company Sent Letters To All The Wives
Asking How Was The Trip.
All Of Them Gave A Same Reply...

"Which Trip ?"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 17, 2011, 06:16:01 PM

Boy: Marry Me..?

Girl: Do You Have A House...?
Boy: No..

Girl: Do You Have A Bmw Car...?
Boy: No..

Girl: How Much Is Your Salary..?
Boy: No Salary, But...

Girl: No But.You Have Nothing.
How Can I Marry You? Leave Please!!

Boy: (talking To Himself) I Have One Villa, 3 Property
Lands, 3 Ferrari ' S, And 3 Porsche's. Why Would I Need
To Have A Bmw ? How Could I Get A Salary When
I'm The Boss!
& The Girl Lost Her Chance =P =D

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 17, 2011, 06:17:13 PM

Put ur hand on a Hot Pan,
a second seems an hour,

But put ur hand on a Hot Girl
An hour seems a second

That's Einstein's theory of Relativity

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 17, 2011, 06:17:44 PM

A Belated Teachers' Day

Its A Humble Request
"80% Of Teachers r
Suffering From Throat
Pain By Teaching Students."
So Plz
.
.
.
.
BUNK d Classes As Much
As Possible
n
Save Our Teachers

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 19, 2011, 03:02:32 AM

A girl Fell Down from 80th floor,
A boy caught her on 65th floor and asked her...
will u hug me...?
She replied.., offcourse not...
he dropped her.
...........
she was caught on 30th floor by another boy....
He asked her, will u kiss me..?
no not at all, she replied
he dropped her too..

she prayed for last chance when a boy hold her on 5th floor.
she immediately said...
ok i will hug u and kiss u..
The boy dropped her and saying.

Astagfirullah !!
mera roza hai :P [ I am fasting ]

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 19, 2011, 03:04:09 AM

SANTA went to court

JUDGE:
"Order ! Order !"

SANTA:
"1 Pizza, 2 Dosa, 3 Idli & 1 Cold-drink !"

JUDGE:
"Shut Up !"

SANTA:"No,No..7-Up!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 19, 2011, 03:04:46 AM

"Call A Girl Pretty
& She Will Remember It For
5 Minutes..!

Call A Girl Ugly
& She Will Remember It
Forever..!"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 19, 2011, 03:06:42 AM

2 Guys Were Following 2 Girls
Both Girls Took Rakhi & Tied To Their Hands.

1st Guy To Second-What Will We Do Now?

2nd Guy-U Marry My Sis,
I Will Marry Ur Sis

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 19, 2011, 03:07:15 AM

- New Advertisement -

WANTED SINGLE GIRL,
Able To Cook,
Love And Have Job,
Must Have
HOUSE & CAR.
Plz Send Picture 0f
HOUSE & CAR ... =P =D

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 19, 2011, 03:07:51 AM

Q- a parrots sits on an elephant and the elephant died!!
Prove how is this possible….?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Physics student:
assume that elephant’s name is parrot
&
parrot’s name is elephant:d:p:)
physics can prove anything

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 19, 2011, 03:08:33 AM

A Small Boy Took A Knife
And Wrote His Girlfriend’s Name 0n His Hand..
After A Minute He Started Crying Loudly..
Why ???
.
.
.
Paining ???
.
.
.
No !!
.
.
.
Then ???
.
.
.
Spelling Mistake !!! :O

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 19, 2011, 03:09:03 AM

Husband was seriously ill.
Doc to wife :-
Give him healthy breakfast, be pleasant & in gud mood,
don’t discuss ur problems,
no tv serial, dont demand new clothes & gold jewels,
Do this for 1 yr & he will be ok.

On the way home..

Husband :- wat did the doc say ?
Wife :- .No chance for u to survive

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on November 21, 2011, 10:11:34 PM

Husband texts to wife on cell..
"Hi,what r u doing Darling?"
Wife: I'm dying..!
Husband jumps with joy but types "Sweet Heart, how can I live without U?"
Wife: "U idiot! I'm dying my hair.."
Husband: "Bloody English Language!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on November 21, 2011, 10:12:51 PM

Laws Which Newton Forgot To State
LAW OF QUEUE: If you change ur queue, the one you have left will start to move faster than the one you are in now.
LAW OF TELEPHONE: When you dial a wrong number, you never get an engaged one.
LAW OF MECHANICAL REPAIR: After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.
LAW OF WORKSHOP: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
BATH THEOREM: When the body is immersed in water, the telefone rings.
LAW OF ENCOUNTERS: The probability of meeting someone u know increases when u r with sum1 u don't want to b seen with : P

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on November 21, 2011, 10:14:20 PM

Attention plz...!

Don't drink unboiled water..

Because..
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Fish live in water without pampers..
Seriously..!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on November 21, 2011, 10:14:56 PM

A Question Asked In A Talent Test

If U R Married To One Of The Twin Sisters,
How Would You Recognize Your Wife?

The Answer Came:

"Why Should I ? :-P

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on November 21, 2011, 10:15:55 PM

There are Two Ways To Rule a Girl / Women
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
And nobody knows them.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on November 21, 2011, 10:17:24 PM

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on November 21, 2011, 10:18:24 PM

A Journey Of A Thousand
Miles Begins With A Single Step.

Then,
You Get In A Car
And Go To The Airport.

It Doesn't Take That Long :p

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on November 21, 2011, 10:18:51 PM

Sunglasses:
Allowing You To Stare At
People Without Getting
Caught.
It's Like Facebook In Real Life.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on November 21, 2011, 10:22:45 PM

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on November 21, 2011, 10:23:11 PM

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on November 21, 2011, 10:23:48 PM

What is the perfect example
of both Good & Bad Luck?

The naughty wind blows the girl's skirt high (Good luck)

but at the same time

Dust falls into the boy's eyes (Bad luck)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on November 21, 2011, 10:24:48 PM

When We are in Class. We Are Students.
When they are in class They are Scholars.

When v Correct our Writing its Overwriting.
When they Correct their, its Correction,

When v copy from Others, We are Cheaters,
When they Copy they Quote

When We don't do our work in time, We are Sluggish,
When they don't do, they are Busy,

When We Joke in class, We are Jokers,
When They are joke, They r Witty :P

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on November 21, 2011, 10:26:25 PM

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: RemO on November 21, 2011, 10:27:02 PM

C H I L D H O O D
Is Like Being
D R U N K . . .
Everyone Remembers
What You Did,
Except You ..

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 26, 2011, 06:04:45 AM

Do the following !!!
1) go to google translate
2) type in "Who said to sell pepsi for Rs.65?"
3) translate English to Arabic
4) Copy the Arabic version
5) choose translation from Arabic to English
6) and the truth will be unleashed!!!!

HAHAHHAHAHAHHAHHAHHAHAH!!!!!!!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 26, 2011, 06:05:21 AM

Words Written Above A Classroom Clock….
“This Clock Will Never Be Stolen,
Coz Too Many Students Are Watching It..!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 26, 2011, 06:05:43 AM

At Night If Mosquito Bites,
What Should We Do.?
?
?
?
?
Just Scratch N Sleep Again
We R Not Rajnikant
2 Make The Mosquito Say Sorry.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 26, 2011, 06:06:06 AM

4 Stages of marriage:

Mad for each other.
Made for each other.
Mad at each other.
Mad bcoz of each other

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 26, 2011, 06:06:30 AM

A Good Teacher Is Who
Tells To Study Hard...

But,,

A Best Teacher Is Who
Stands Outside D
Examination Hall N Shouts. . .

"OYE CHECKING WALE AA GAYE
APNI APNI PARCHIY CHUPA LO..." =P =D

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 26, 2011, 06:06:53 AM

''An Intelligent Wife Is One
Who Makes Sure She Spends
So Much
That
Her Husband
Can't Afford Another
Women" :P

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 26, 2011, 06:07:19 AM

1st Man: Which Is The Best Month
To Get Married..?

2nd Man: Octemb ruary

1st Man: Don't Be Silly,
There Is No Such Month

2nd Man: Exactly

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 26, 2011, 06:07:42 AM

After an accident,
A v.angry driver: I showed u d headlights
& told u 2 go by side.

Santa: I also started d wipers
& said No, no..No no. :D

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 28, 2011, 06:30:13 AM

All say that love is more important than money..

Have u ever tried paying ur bill with a hug.. ? ? :P ;)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 28, 2011, 06:30:38 AM

In a Party A Handsome guy askd a gal,"r u going 2 dance?"

She felt so happy & said-"yes"

& d guy said-"dats gud,so can i hav ur chair?" :D

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 28, 2011, 06:31:07 AM

Funny Oxymoron's:

(An oxymoron is usually defined as a phrase in which two words of contradictory meaning are brought together)

1) Clearly misunderstood
2) Exact Estimate
3) Small Crowd
4) Act Naturally
5) Found Missing
6) Fully Empty
7) Pretty ugly
8) Seriously funny
9) Only choice
10) Original copies
&
the Mother of all
11) Happily Married

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 28, 2011, 06:31:34 AM

Woman Buys A New Sim
Card Puts It In Her Phone
And Decides To Surprise Her
Husband Who Is Seated On
The Couch In The Living Room.

She Goes To The Kitchen,
Calls Her Husband With
The New Number:

"Hello Darling"
The Husband Responds
In A Low Tone:

"Let Me Call U Back
Later Honey, The Dumb
Lady Is In The Kitchen.. =P

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 28, 2011, 06:31:58 AM

Newtons Universal Law Of Love:

Every boy on earth is attracted towards a girl
with a force directly proportional to the figure of the girl
and
Inversely proportional to strength of her brother..!!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 28, 2011, 06:32:36 AM

Did You Know . . .?
That
"HEELS" Are Man's Invention
To Make It Harder For A
Woman To Run Away.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 28, 2011, 06:32:59 AM

A man received d phone
from emergency room of hospital

Doctor: Your wife was in a fatal car
accident & I've bad n good news.
The bad news is,
She has lost both arms n legs n
will b on a respirator d rest of her life.

Man: 0h my God, whats the good
news?

Doctor: I'm kidding, She is Dead... =P =D

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on November 28, 2011, 06:33:22 AM

Hey Fill Up The Blanks :-
Your Name_______
Percentage In SSC_____%
Gender_____
.
.
.
.
Now Read 'Only' The Answers..! :D :D ;) :P

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 10, 2011, 06:25:04 AM

Seeing a Cockroach on ur bed
is nothing actually....!!
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
The Real Problem Starts When It Disappears...!! ;-) :-P

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 10, 2011, 06:25:27 AM

Funny Truth-

No one is as ugly as their driving license/ identity card picture,

nor as good-looking as their facebook profile pic..! :D ;)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 10, 2011, 06:25:53 AM

Pay My Regards To Ur Father
Who Is Tolerating Such A Dumb Duffer Child,
What A Stamina He Has Got..
I Salute Ur Father:p

Happy Father's day

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 10, 2011, 06:26:20 AM

Air & students hv d same mentality
How?
?
?
?
?
Both r turning d book's pages without reading.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 10, 2011, 06:26:40 AM

A 5th standard kid wrote in his maths answr sheet:
Dear Math,
Im sick & tired of finding ur x
Jst accpt d fact dat she's gone!
Move On dude

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 10, 2011, 06:27:02 AM

A Sweet demand by a kid.
A kid was beaten by his mom.
Dad came n asked- what happen son?
Kid said-I cant adjust with your wife anymore,
I want my own.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 10, 2011, 06:27:21 AM

Woman is like blue tooth ,
U r next 2 her,
she stays connected,
u go away,
she finds new device

Man is like wi-fi,
many devices can connect 2him at a time

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 10, 2011, 06:27:50 AM

In an African Safari,A LION suddenly bounced on Santa's wife.
WIFE-Shoot him! Shoot him!
SANTA-Yes Yes.I'm changing d battery of my camera..

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 10, 2011, 06:28:14 AM

Husband throwing knives on wifes picture.
All were missing the target!
Suddenly he received call from her
"Hi,wat ru doin?"
His honest reply,"MISSING U"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 10, 2011, 06:28:39 AM

A successful man is one
who makes more money
than
his wife can spend.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 15, 2011, 11:03:15 PM

This Funny fact always happen wid me:
Study for one Hour-
No One sees.!
.
.
But pick up mobile just 4 a second,
& Mom/Dad enters d room! ;)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 15, 2011, 11:03:37 PM

New Economic Analysis:

Its better to have a Long distance Relationship:
Because, S.T.D. rates are much Lower than Fuel Rates.... :-P ;-)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 15, 2011, 11:04:05 PM

Wanna make money through Facebook...??
Go to:
Account->
account settings->
and click on
De-activate your Account
than
Start Working...!! Lolz :-P

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 15, 2011, 11:04:27 PM

Wife:-I will die.
Husband:- I will also die.

Wife:-why will you die?
Husband:-because main itni khushi
bardasht nahin ker sakta:D

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 15, 2011, 11:04:53 PM

Could u fax me ur photo very very urgently ?
Mind u - it's really very very urgent,
damn serious and very imp ....
I'm playing cards and
we've misplaced the JOKER.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 15, 2011, 11:05:40 PM

DAD:dear son,why yor sister sitting so silent
SON:Nothing dad sister asked
lipstik, but i gave fevistik.
No chip chip
no chik chik

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 15, 2011, 11:06:03 PM

Santa-What Is Difference
Between COFFEE Shop & WINE
Shop?
Banta-COFFEE Shop Is The
Starting Point Of LOVE & WINE
Shop Is Last Point Of LOVE

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 15, 2011, 11:06:25 PM

A cute love story with happy ending:

One day somebody proposed u!

U said: "i am Not interested."

This way, somebody lived a happy life .

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 15, 2011, 11:06:46 PM

Why love marriage
is better than arranged???
Because
"A KNOWN DEVIL
IS BETTER THAN
AN UNKNOWN GHOST"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 15, 2011, 11:07:07 PM

Having "WIFE" Is A
Part Of Living...

But

Having "GIRLFRIEND"
Along With The "WIFE" Is
Art Of Living

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 15, 2011, 11:07:28 PM

A Simple fact:

Boys Can Never B
Satisfied With
3 Things In Life:

-Mobile
-Bike
-Girlfriend

Because;
There Is Always
A Better Model
Available In Future ;)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 15, 2011, 11:07:51 PM

One Of The Best Quote,

Always have a

BACKUP

BEFORE

BREAKUP! :p

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 16, 2011, 10:20:15 PM

Best Reply Ever By a Girl
When She Is Asked For a Kiss
By Her Boyfriend
.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Karlo :p
Just do it :p

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 16, 2011, 10:20:52 PM

2 MEN TALKING

1st:
I am getting married because
I am tired of eating out,
cleaning house & doing laundry

2nd:
Strange,
I am taking divorce for same reasons!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 16, 2011, 10:21:18 PM

A Boy Was Going With His Girl Friend

Friend Asked : Who Is She?

Boy : My Cousin.

The Frend Said: Last Year She Was My Cousin.! :D

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 16, 2011, 10:22:08 PM

Someone Asked Shakespeare:
"U Married A Girl Elder Than U, Why?"

He Showed Him A Calendar N Said
"A Week Has 7 Days;
Can U Say Which Day Is Younger,
Either Sunday Or Saturday ??

So, Love Comes From Heart Not In Age"
Love Has No Age.

-MORAL:
Senior Girls R Also Available For Boys:P

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 16, 2011, 10:22:38 PM

Specially dedicated to boys:
A kiss is like a stamp,
Once u stamp a gal,
she wouldn't go anywhere else

Guys r like stamp paper,
jitne bhi lagao kum hai

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 16, 2011, 10:23:04 PM

True Love is like a pillow.
U could HUG it when Ur in trouble.
U could CRY on it when Ur in pain.
U could EMBRACE it when Ur happy.
Want True Love?
Spend Rs.50 buy a Pillow.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 16, 2011, 10:23:33 PM

Define a True Music Lover?

A Girl singing in a Bathroom
While Taking Bath
and a Boy Near the Keyhole
is Using His Ears Not His Eyes.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 16, 2011, 10:24:03 PM

Santa was drawing money from ATM.
Banta, who was just behind him in
the line said: I've seen ur password. It's ****.
Sant: U r wrong. It's 1394.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 16, 2011, 10:34:36 PM

Interviewer:what is skeleton?
Sardar:Sir, skeleton is a person
who started dieting but forgot to stop it..!!!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 16, 2011, 10:35:01 PM

U are a BITCH

Beautiful
Intelligent
Talented
Cute
Hilarious

r u smiling now?
?
?
?
*YOU ARE REALLY BITCH*

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 16, 2011, 10:35:24 PM

Question : Why do girls close
their eyes while kissing a guy?
Guess‚¦
Guess
.
.
.
Answer : Yeh ladkiyan ladkon
ko kabhi khush nahi dekh sakti.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 16, 2011, 10:35:48 PM

Beautiful flowers die....
Nice stories end......
Lovely songs fade........ ..
Momeries are forgotten... ..
All things comes to end.....
But people like YOU always remain forever
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
BECAUSE GHOSTS NEVER DIE

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 16, 2011, 10:36:17 PM

koi chez be-wafai se barh ker kia hogi,
Ghum-e-tanhai judai se barh ker kia hogi,

Kisi ko deni ho jawani main saza,
to wo saza PARHAI se barh ker kia hogi:-)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 16, 2011, 10:36:41 PM

In bio practical:
Examiner:Tell me the name of
this bird by seeing it's legs only?
Sardar:I don't know.
Examiner:You failed, what's your name?
Sardar:See my legs & tell my name

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 16, 2011, 10:37:14 PM

One boy went to meet his girlfriend
when he came back at home
mom asked
kahaan gaey they ?
boy:us se milney
mom: kis liye?
boy: haan bohat kiss liye:D

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 16, 2011, 10:37:41 PM

Sardar on phone:

Doctor my wife is pergnant.She is having pain right now.

Doctor: Is this her first child?

Sardar: No this is her husband speaking‚¦

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 18, 2011, 04:16:14 AM

twinkle Twinkle little star,
teri girl friend gaye bazar,

us ko mil gaya MAJNO ka pyar,
ab tu beth ker makhiyan maaar

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 18, 2011, 04:16:44 AM

Do U know the fullform of COLLEGE:-
C-Come,
O-On,
L-Lets,
L-Love,
E-Each,
G-Girl,
E-Equally......

Thats why boys go to college

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 18, 2011, 04:17:24 AM

Love is possible after friendship
but
friendship is not possible after love
because
medicines work before death
later nothing can be cured....!!!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 18, 2011, 04:17:48 AM

A man to Santa:
Your friend is kissing your wife in your home.
Santa rushes home and came back within
half an hour and slapped the man
and said:
"He's not my friend."

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 18, 2011, 04:18:26 AM

God thought that since
he couldn't b everywhere
he made a mother.

Then devil thought that
he couldn't be everywhere
he made a mother-in-law.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 18, 2011, 04:18:57 AM

Interviewer to Millionaire: To whom do you owe your success as a millionaire?"
Millionaire: "I owe everything to my wife."

Interviewer: "Wow, she must be some woman.
Interviewer: "What were you before you married her?"
Millionaire: "A Billionaire"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 18, 2011, 04:19:16 AM

1st ever intelligent sardar.

Teacher: what do u call a person
who cannot hear anything?

sardar: u can call him anything,
because he cannot hear anything:-)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 18, 2011, 04:19:45 AM

A man found his wife having affair with a guy.
He decided 2 kill himself & his wife.

Apne kaan pe pistol lagai aur bola-
tu khush mat ho agla number tera hai!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 18, 2011, 04:20:46 AM

Whos hot... Its U,
Whos
Charming... Its U,
Whos
Sweetest.. Its U,
Whos
Intelligent... Its U,
Whos dear & near friend... Its U
Whos a liar.. Its me

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 18, 2011, 04:21:06 AM

The latest slogn of boys:
Pakistan is our nation
Girls are our Destination
Dating is Our Occupation
Flirting is our Profession
Leave about Education

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 18, 2011, 04:21:28 AM

A sardarji goes to a chinese restaurant
and puts his finger
on the last of menu: Bring this.

Waiter: Oh! you can't get it
because he is the owner of restaurant.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 18, 2011, 04:22:37 AM

WHY STUDENT FAIL
Sundays-52 in a year,Days left 313
Summer holidays 50,Days left 263
8 hrs daily sleep-130 days GONe, Days left 141
1 hr daily playing means 15 days,Days left 126
2 hrs daily for eating means 30 days.Days left 96,
1 hr talking means 15 days.,Days left 81
Exams days 35 days,Days left 46
Eid & Gov holidays 20, Days left 26
Movies,TV at least 25 days,Days left 1
That 1 day is your BIRTHDAY.
Hun banda SALGIRHA waly din bhi parhy?

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 18, 2011, 04:22:59 AM

I have lots of jokes in my inbox,
But I can't send you all of them,
It will take a lot of time,
So I'm sending you just 1 joke
.
.
.
"You are so beautiful"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 18, 2011, 04:23:21 AM

American:-Dogs can find Bombs in my country.
Japanese:-Fish can play Ball in my country.
Pakistani:-Thats not a matter,Monkey can read SMS in my country...

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 18, 2011, 04:23:43 AM

A sardarji's boy asked his dad:
What is a grownup joke?
Sardar ji replied:
any joke which is eighteen years old

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 18, 2011, 04:24:22 AM

Teacher : U failure !
At ur age Bill gates stood first in the class
Student : Mind u, Sir,
but at ur age hitler commited suicide

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 18, 2011, 04:25:47 AM

Cricket is getting excited day by day with the introduction of ICL n T20...

Same rules should be applied in Examz!

(1) Exams Timing Should Be Reduced To One Hour.

(2) Power Play - No Invigilator In Exam Hall For 1st 15 mins.

(3) Cheer Leaders - To Dance After Every Right Answer Written.

(4) Strategic Time-Out - Time For Students For Discussion.

(5) Super Over - Chance For Students To Form Their Own Question. :-)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 18, 2011, 04:26:08 AM

What is the difference between Monkey & Donkey ?
Monkey saves this message &
Donkey deletes this message.
Choice is yours

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 18, 2011, 04:26:30 AM

Sardar to doctor:
When I sleep, monkeys
play football in my dreams.

Dr:No problem,
just take this medicine b4 sleep.

Sardar: Kal se khaonga aaj final hai.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 18, 2011, 04:26:51 AM

Impact of Movies:

Teacher :- Who is Mahatma Gandhi?

Student:- He is the one who helped
Munna Bhai to impress his girlfriend!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 18, 2011, 04:27:11 AM

Wife: I wish I was a newspaper
so I would be in ur hands allday.

Husband: I too wish that u were
a newspapers so I could have
a new one everyday.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 18, 2011, 04:27:31 AM

Q: What did the gangster's son
tell his dad when he failed his examination?

A: Dad they questioned me for 3 hours
but I never told them anything."

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 18, 2011, 04:27:52 AM

Style of break up:
Boy bought gift for His Girl friend-
GF:Wat the hell would I do with this rocket?
Boy: U wanted stars na?
Now sit on it and GET LOST:p

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 18, 2011, 04:28:24 AM

I always think about U.
I cant live without U.
I really need U.
Im totally mad about U.
I just wanna be with U.
Im crazy 4 U.
I wanna marry U.
I LOVE U.

Aisa mujhe bajuwali kehti hai‚¦
(My neighbour say all this to me)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:37:15 PM

Sardar english k paper main fail ho gaya,
He did translation:

1.Main aam admi nahi hon
I'm not a mango man

2.Sarda or garma fruit hain.
Colda & hota r fruits

3.Mujhey bhi english ati hay
English comes 2 me also

4.do ro do chaar.
give and give four.

5.Mera taluk hari pur hazara se hay
I belong 2 green pur thousanda:)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:37:46 PM

A man in Hell asked Devil:
Can I make a call to my Wife?
After making call he asked how much to pay.
Devil : Nothing, Hell to hell is Free.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:38:23 PM

In a train, ticket checker to a saint: Ticket please!
Saint: I don't have.
TT: Where do you want to go?
Saint: Lord Ram's birth place, Ayodhya!
TT: Come, lets go!
Saint: Where?
TT: Lord Krishna'a birth place, Jail.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:38:46 PM

A sardar had a child after 3 month of marriage.
He asked his wife ye 3 month k bad bacha kaise howa?

Wife replied:tumhari shadi ko kitna arsa hua?
sardar:3 months.

Wife: or meri shadi ko ?
Sardar: 3 months

Wife: or bacha kitne month k baad?
Sardar:3 month.

Wife: total kitne hue?
Sardar: oye 9 months & start dancing
Balle Balle;->

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:39:08 PM

Hum ho gaye tumhare tumhe sochne k bad,
Ab na daikhen gay kisi ko tumhe daikhne k bad,

Dunya chor dain gai tumhai chorne k bad,
KHUDA! Maaf kare itne jhut bolne k bad

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:39:36 PM

Do u know similarity
between Dinosaurs and Decent Girls?
?
?
?
?
Both don't exist.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:40:02 PM

HUSBAND and WIFE are like 2 tyres of a vehicle

If 1 punctures, the vehicle can't move further

M0ral:
always Keep a SPARE TYRE....

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:40:23 PM

A young girl after her honeymoon
came fully exhausted and tired,

When her friends asked her what happened?

She replied :
When this 70 year old bastard told me
he has saved a lot from last 50 years,

"I thought It was MONEY"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:40:43 PM

A Youing Couple Were
Having Their First Fight
And It Was A Big One
After A While,

The Husband Said:
"When We Got Married,
You Promised To Love,
Honor n Obey"

His Bride Replied:
"I Know But I Didn't
Want To Start An
Argument In Front Of
All Those People At d
Wedding"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:41:07 PM

In a school function

A K.G boy started closing his ears with
both hands,
when girl was about to start her speech
Others asked him Why r you closing your ears?

He replied: Dude, She is my Girlfriend n She is
gonna start her speech with
.
.
.
.
.
.
My Dear Brothers n Sisters :-)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:41:40 PM

2012 is coming

Wish u a very
Happy new year
Valentine's day
Basant
23rd march
14 august
Eid ul fitr
Eid ul azha
Friendship day
Mother, father
Dadi, dada
Nana, nani
Children's day
Happy b'day
365 good mornings
After noons, evenings'
& nights

Roz roz ka drama nahi
Hota mujh se
Ab pura saal mat kehna
SMS nahi kia

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:42:02 PM

What's the similarity between chewing gum & begum(wife) ??
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

Both are sweet at the beginning
and
become tasteless, shapeless and chipku in the eNd...

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:42:25 PM

Boy askd girl: y do u love a rose,
Which dies in a day. But
Don't love me,
Who dies 4 u everyday??

Girl replied:
.

.

.

Oye hoye...
What a dialogue!! :d

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:42:54 PM

Sardar 2 friend: Guess how many
coins I have in my pocket?
Friend:If I guess right, u give me 1?
Sardar:Oji, I will give both of them

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:43:23 PM

Santa: Look a thief has entered our kitchen
and he is eating the cake I made.

Banta: Whom should I call now,
Police or Ambulance?

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:43:49 PM

Boy1:Meet my wife Tina
Boy2.Oh! I know her
Boy1:How?
Boy2:v were caught sleeping together
Boy1:What the hell?
Boy2.during lecture in maths class

Think +ve:)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:44:08 PM

Dil ka dard dil torrne waley kiya jaaney,
Pyar ke rivajon ko zamana kiya jaaney,

Hoti hai kitni takleef larrki ko pataney main,
Ye ghar pe baitha larki ka baap kiya jaaney

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:44:56 PM

Sardar: I havnt slept all nite in the train.
Friend: Y?
Sardar: Got upper berth.
Friend: Y didnt u ecchanged?
Sardar: oye, there was nobody
2 exchange in the lower birth..

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:45:17 PM

TEACHER: Kashif, give me a sentence starting with "I".
Kashif: I is ......

TEACHER: No, Kashif. Always say, "I am."
Kashif: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:45:39 PM

Sardarji & his wife going to city in auto.
Driver adjusted miror.
Sardarji shouted you are seeing my wife.

Go & sit back. I will drive auto...:D

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:46:02 PM

True bravery is to arrive home ...
fully drunk..
a late night out..

and mom waiting with a jharu
in hand and you ask

"hey mom, abhi tak jaag rahi ho."

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:46:49 PM

Kash tumhare chere pe chicken-pox ke daag hote,
.
.
.
chand to tum ho hi,
sitaray bhi saath hote!!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:47:11 PM

Bubbli got caugt on date
on Independance day
.
Major Rohail-
What is this?
.
Bubbli-
Dad today is freedom day,
so let me do what I want

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:47:47 PM

Sardarji to others:
Did anyone lose money wrapped in a rubber band?
One said, Yes I did
Sardar: Well, it's your lucky day,
I found the rubberband!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:49:08 PM

Can we do romance in the midnight today?
I'm in a good mood:)
Just a little bit of kissing and biting!!
Reply me soon,
yours Loving Mosquito.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:49:37 PM

Wife Running After A Garbage Truck:
Am I Too Late For The Garbage?

Hubby Following Her Yelled: Not Yet.
Jumpppp Innnn Fastttt.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:49:58 PM

Girlfriend:Its 2 tight
Boyfriend:Dont worry,Ill put it slowly,

Girlfriend:Push it in,
Boyfriend:Ah..I cant,

Girlfriend:Its painful,
Boyfriend:Forget it.
.
.
.
.
Well buy new WEDDING RING!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:50:30 PM

*Love b4 Marriage*
Janu...tum nahe to mei nahe,
mei nahe to tum nahe...

*Love after Marriage*
"baghairta"...Aj tu nahe ya me nahe

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:50:53 PM

Sardar selected a short girl to marry.

Why?

Because guru ji told him

Musibat jitni choti ho utna acha hai ...:-P

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:51:18 PM

Four guys
1 from Harward:
1 Oxford
1 Texas
&
a Sardar from Pujab university

1 common question:
What is the fastest thing in world?

Oxford:Light
Harvard:Thought
Texas:Blink of an eye
Sardar:Its loose motions,
because last night I was lying in my bed
& before I could blink,think or turn on the lights,
it was over!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:51:39 PM

Q: Hear about the terrorist
that hijacked a 747 full of lawyers?

A: He threatened to release one
every hour if his demands weren't met.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:52:02 PM

A man went to the Police Station wishing
to speak with the burglar who had
broken into his house the night before.

“Youll get your chance in court,‚ said the Police officer.

“No, no no!‚ said the man.
“I want to know how he got into the house
without waking my wife. Ive been trying for years.‚

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:52:28 PM

Positive thinking is like.....
U r standing on the middle of the road.........
&
suddenly a crow beats on your head....
But you remain calm...
and thanks to God...
that cows dont fly:)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:52:53 PM

Patient : What are the chances
of my recovering doctor?

Doctor : One hundred percent.
Medical records show that
nine out of ten people die of the disease you have.

Yours is the tenth case I've treated.The others all died.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:53:20 PM

Teacher : Which is more important to us,
the sun or the moon?
Pupil : The moon.

Teacher : Why?
Pupil : The moon gives us light at night
when we need it but the sun gives us light
only in the day time when we dont need it.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:53:41 PM

Newspaper Mein News Lugi K
"50% Of Sardars Are Donkeys"

The Sardars Protested.

Next Day News Lagi K
"50% Of Sardars R Not Donkeys"

The Sardars Celebrated.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:54:03 PM

A man went to hell and asked
the Yamraj if he can call his wife.
yamraj said "u can do that"

after man spoke to his wife..
he asked how much to pay yamraj
yamraj said.."hell to hell is free"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:54:21 PM

The human brain is most outstanding thing.......
it functions 24hrs 365 days.....
it functions right from the time u r Born....
until you fall in love

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:54:45 PM

Husband texts to wife on cell..

"Hi,what r u doing Darling?"

Wife: I'm dying..!

Husband jumps with joy but types "Sweet Heart, how can I live without U?"

Wife: "U idiot! I'm dying my hair.."

Husband: "Bloody English Language!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:55:15 PM

''The POLITE Way to PEE!"

Teacher trying to teach good manners asked her students this question:
Michael if u were on a date having diñner with a nice young lady, how wud u tell her that u hav to go to the bathroom?
Michael, "Just a min i hav to go pee".
Teacher: That would be rude & impolite. How about u SAM. Sam said "i realy need 2 go 2 toilet, i m sory". Teacher, "thats beter but stil not nice to say word toilet. Oh u little Jonny can u use ur brain?
JONNY said,
"Darling,may i plz b excused for a moment?I've 2 shake hands with a very dear frnd of mine, whom i hope 2 introduce 2 u after diner" :-p

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:55:47 PM

Difference b/w shit & Oohh shit:
.
A boy Threw a love letter to a girl
.
but it fell on her brother..
Shittt!
.

And Her brother was GAY..
Oohh ShIt
:-P

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:56:08 PM

Attention plz...!

Don't drink unboiled water..

Because..
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Fish live in water without pampers..
Seriously..!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:56:34 PM

A man came home late at night after a party.
His wife yelled:
"how would you feel if you don't see me for two days?"
The man couldnt believe his luck: 'that would be great'!
Monday passed and he didnt see her......
Tuesday and wednesday passed too.....
On thursday his swelling became better
And now he could see her from the
Corner of one eye;)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:56:55 PM

A Question Asked In A Talent Test

If U R Married To One Of The Twin Sisters,
How Would You Recognize Your Wife?

The Answer Came:

"Why Should I ? :-P

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:57:15 PM

Girl : I'm warning you
My Mummy is coming back in half an hour..

Boy : But I'm not doing anything..
Girl : That's why I'm warning you..

Hurry up ! :D :D

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:57:34 PM

Choosing Career Is Like
Chosing A Wife From 10 Girls.

Even If You Pick The Most Beautiful,
Intelligent, Kindest Woman,
There's Still Pain Of Losing The Other 9 :p

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:57:54 PM

A boy with a sweet girl entered a jewellery shop
&
Choose a ring worth 8 lacs for her.
Gave a cheque & said she will collect ring on Monday after the cheque is cleared.
.
On Monday.
Jeweller called boy:
There's no money in your account.

Boy:
I know,
But, you can't imagine what a weekend I enjoyed:-)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:58:18 PM

A New Added element to the Periodic Table.

Element Name:GIRL

Symbol: G

Atomic Weight:dont even dare to ask :-D

Physical Properties..
*boils at anything
*can freeze at anytime
*melts if handled wid love n care
*very bitter if mis handled

Chemical Properties.
*very reactive
*highly unstable
*posses strong affinity for gold n silver
*money reducing agent
*volatile when left alone

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:58:38 PM

Diff B/W Ignorance & selfcontrol?

When u c mirror & u don't laugh at yourself,
that is ignorance!

&
When i look at u & i don't laugh,
thats called self control:-)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:58:58 PM

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:59:20 PM

I Wonder If 1 Day
Somebody Will Ever Come
N
Knock 0n My Door
N
Tell Me
"Hey , V Have 7 Mutual Friends
In FACEBOOK "
Can I Come In ... =P =D

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 19, 2011, 11:59:41 PM

Why Men n Women Don't Understand Each Other?
Bcoz
God Gave Good Brains To Men
n
Good Hearts To Women

But

Men Use Their Hearts
&
Women Use Their Brains

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 12:00:02 AM

Boy and girl of class 2 asked teacher:
"can kids of our age have kids?"

Teacher replied " NO Never!!"

Boy said to girl :
"see i told you not to worry!!!!".

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 03:18:17 AM

Girl:Its 2 tight
Boy:Dont worry,Ill do it slowly,
Gal:Push it in,
Boy:Ah..I cant,
Gal:Its painful,
Boy:Forget it.
.
.
.
.
Well buy new WEDDING RING!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 03:18:53 AM

Most interesting line written
on the front of T-shirt of a girl,
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Excuse me !
My face is above.;-)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 03:19:21 AM

Put ur hand on a Hot Pan,
a second seems an hour,

But put ur hand on a Hot Girl
An hour seems a second

That's Einstein's theory of Relativity

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 03:19:48 AM

SILENCE
Is d best Answer
for all questions

SMILE
Is d best Reaction
in all situations

Unfortunately

BOTH Never Help In
any EXAM, VIVA, REVIEW & INTERVIEW :P:)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 03:20:12 AM

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 03:21:09 AM

Teacher:
What should be in a
book to make it a bestseller?

Tommy:
A girl on the cover
and
no cover on the girl.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 03:21:35 AM

Wife is dreaming in the middle of the night
and suddenly shouts: "Up! Quick! My husband is back!"

Man gets up, jumps out of the window,
hurts himself, and then realizes: "Damn, I am the husband!"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 03:21:57 AM

Ultimate insult..

I Iove your smile becoz..
.
.
.
.
.
.
My favorite colour is "YELLOW"!! :D'

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 03:22:24 AM

Do you Like me as I am??
Or do I haVe to
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Request GOD to impRove your taste ?? :D

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 03:23:06 AM

Aftr engagemnt!
Girl:
Now stop looking at girls,u r commited now!

Boy:
Oho what do u mean,
if i m on diet,
that doesnt mean that i cant look at MENU . . :-D

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 03:24:02 AM

A Good Teacher Is Who
Tells To Study Hard...

But,,

A Best Teacher Is Who
Stands Outside D
Examination Hall N Shouts. . .

"OYE CHECKING WALE AA GAYE
APNI APNI PARCHIY CHUPA LO..." =P =D

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 03:24:25 AM

Rich Man: Today, I have 14 Cars,
18 Bikes, 4 Bungalows, 3 Farm Houses

What do you have?

Poor Man: I have a boy

whos Girl Friend is
.
.
.
.
Your Daughter..!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 03:24:52 AM

The best quote of advertisment
written in front of a famous beauty parlour :

"Don't whistle at the girl going out from here,
She might b ur grand mother..."

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 03:25:20 AM

ECG if u go out with wife
/l__,-.__/\_,_,-.

ECG if u go out with girlfriend
_/l_/l_/l_/l_/\_/\_

ECG if wife catches u with girlfriend...
/\________

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 03:25:47 AM

"Interesting Confusions"

1. Can u cry under water?

2. Do fish ever get thirsty?

3. Why don't birds fall out of trees when they sleep?

4. What do u call a male lady bird?

5. Why is it called building when it's already built?

6. When they say dog food is new & improved in taste, who tastes it?

7. If money doesn't grow on trees then why banks have branches?

8. Why does a round pizza come in sqaure box?

9.Why doesn't glue, stick to its bottle;-)..!!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 03:26:16 AM

Height Of Illiteracy:

You Take A Blade
And
Write Your Lovers Name On Your Arm.
.
.
.
.
And
Make A Spelling Mistake.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 03:26:40 AM

The difference between scientific theory and reality
is like the difference between
reading the menu and eating dinner.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 03:27:03 AM

Cutest Proposal -
A Boy Rings D Door-Bell Of A Girls Home.
&
Asks ,
"Do U Belive In Love At First Sight
Or
Should I Come Back Again.."

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 03:44:31 AM

Sardars Friend: Yaar,
Last Year The Name Plate Outside Your House
Read Santa Singh, B.A.
This Year It Reads Santa Singh, M.A.
When Did You Finish Your Masters Degree?
Sardar: You Dont Understand.
Last Year My Wife Died,
I Put B.A. To Indicate “Bachelor Again‚.
Then I Took A Second Wife, So M.A. Is “Married Again‚.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 03:44:51 AM

Worlds smallest resignation letter?

Respected sir,

I love Ur wife.

Thank you

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 03:47:54 AM

Any man who can drive safely
while kissing a pretty girl
is simply not giving the kiss
the attention it deserves.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 03:48:20 AM

You know why women starts with 'W'...
because all questions start with "W".. !
Who ?
Why ?
What ?
When ?
Which ?
Whom ?
Where ?
&
Finally Wife..!!!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 03:48:40 AM

GIRL:My heart is like a mobile
and you are the sim card

BOY:I m very happy. . .
Gal:dont b too happy. . .
If I get a new offer
I will change the sim card..!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 03:48:58 AM

Examiner:y r u under tension?
Did u forget admit card,ID,or calculator?

studnt:No Sir!
By mistake i have brought tomorrow
exam's pharray (Cheating material) today:-)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 03:49:21 AM

Hey U Know
Which is the best day to propose a girl.. April 1
U Know Why??
If she accept its your luck
otherwise just tell April Foooooll.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 20, 2011, 03:49:50 AM

A ThermoMeter is n0t the 0nly thing
that gets a "DEGREE" without having a "BRAIN"...! :p

A silent msg f0r all studnts;-)

Title: ~ SMS Jokes 4 U ~
Post by: MysteRy on December 21, 2011, 09:32:01 PM

(https://friendstamilchat.in/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1125.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fl587%2Fgif-mania%2Falbum84%2Fx_3be1300c.gif&hash=9a9a7fb3a69b2843c3f6f62a96ffe6cde9226035)
(https://friendstamilchat.in/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fth820.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fzz125%2Fjosephb555%2Fth_dancingbaby.gif&hash=db24987b7e94f326f05932c4803fc2e6b4541762)(https://friendstamilchat.in/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.hi2forum.com%2Fimage.php%3Fu%3D45080%26amp%3Bdateline%3D1306511440%26amp%3Btype%3Dprofile&hash=eab264399d2d70318a4cf489770a0881de23c495)(https://friendstamilchat.in/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fth820.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fzz125%2Fjosephb555%2Fth_dancingbaby.gif&hash=db24987b7e94f326f05932c4803fc2e6b4541762)

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Enaku 3 vayasu irukum pothu enkitta

ella pengalum kiss ketanga,koduthane.

Ippa athai nan thirupi keta thara matenkiranga.

"Nanri marantha pengal".

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boy: paatti ethuku en melay ivalavu pasama iruka?

grandma: ni thanda nalaki nan setha "kolli" vaika pora

boy: po paatti nalaki enaku school iruku,athanala inaki vachiratuma?

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dad: Examla oru ponna paathu copy adichu pass pannitenu solriye unaku vetkama

illaya?

son: ovvoru aanin vetriku pinnalum oru ponnu irupanu neenga thana soneenga daddy

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Life'la oru ponnu frienda kidacha life jolly;

athey ponnu lover agita pocket gali;

athey lover'a ni marriage pannita mavane un life totala gali

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Yaar manasula yaru?

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manager manasula P.A.Stella

P.A.Stella manasula Account raja

Account raja manasula typist kala

Typist kala manasula sales man Mani

Salesman mani manasula "trisha"

Trisha manasula yaru?

vera yaru

keela paru

Name irukum

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Title: ~ Teacher Vs Student SmS Jokes ~
Post by: MysteRy on December 23, 2011, 12:22:49 AM

(https://friendstamilchat.in/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1125.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fl587%2Fgif-mania%2Falbum85%2Fx_3be2066c.gif&hash=1d093cf237a37020c8641b744753e58605254f15)

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~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

TEACHER: unaku entha animal pidikum..?

Stud: poonai pidikum.

TEACHER: Why?

Stud: poonai kurukka vandha en paatti enna school ku anuppa matanga!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Teacher: un padippula romba akkara vachurukkuradhu yaru?
Mani:conductor..
T:yen?
M:avar than daily nee pass'a nee pass'a nu kekkurar!

Padichavanuku 1000 kavalai!
endha kelvi varum endru.
but padikadavanuku ore kavalai!

Maapla, inniki enna examda!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

HOD:ABCD ethana eluthu?
Stu:4
HOD:Total
Stu:5
H:stupid
St:6
H: what?
St:7
H: Nonsense
Stu:8
H:??
Stu: paesu de mapla ippa pesu..

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Teacher:4 girls r walking on the road. change it to exclamatory sentence
student: WOW..!!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:44:17 PM

Ennathan karunanithi DMK la irundhalum avar veetu maadu "AMMA" nu than kathum

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:44:42 PM

Vaazha maram thaar podum! Aana adha vachi road poda mudiyuma??

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:45:10 PM

Ennadhan aeroplane mela parandhaalum Petrol poda keelathaan varanum

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:45:37 PM

Hand wash'nna kai kazhuvaradhu, 'Face wash'nna mugam kazhuvaradhu, Appa 'brain wash' nna,, braina kazhuvaradhaa

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:46:05 PM

Tea cupla tea irukum.Appa world cupla world irukkuma??

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:46:35 PM

Cell moolama sms anuppalaam Aana sms moolama cella anuppa mudiyathu

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:47:01 PM

Adyar Anandhabavan branch Chennai fulla irukkum aanna Adyar Alamarathoda branch adyar-la mattum than irukkum.. ithu than ulagam

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:47:21 PM

Daily Calendar-Le Theydhi Kizhikkardhu Mukkiyam Illai – Andha Theydhi-Le Nee Enna Kizhikkarey-Ngardhu Than Mukkiyam !!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:47:48 PM

Paambu Ethanai Thadavai Padam Eduthalum Athaala Oru Thadavai Kooda Theatre-La Release Panna Mudiyathu

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:48:14 PM

Ration Card A Vatchu Sim Card Vangalam Ana Sim Card A Vatchu Ration Card Vanga Mudiyathu

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:48:40 PM

Nenga Enna Than Thene Potu Koli Valathalum Athu Muta Than Podum 100/100 Ellam Podathu

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:49:05 PM

Kanna Bus Stop La Bus Than Vanthu Nikum Ana Full Stop La Full Vanthu Nikuma

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:49:31 PM

Paaku Marathula Paaku Irukum, Theaku Marathula Thaeku Irukum, Aana Pana Marathula Panam Irukaadhu..!!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:49:57 PM

Cycle La Poana Cycling, Train La Poana Training-A?

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:50:19 PM

Mechanical Engineer Mechanic Aagalam Aana Software Engineer Software Aaga Mudiyadhu..

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:50:44 PM

Kosu Kadicha Tortoise Aethivakkalam Aana Tortoise Kadicha Kosu Aethivakka Mudiyumaaaaaaaaaa!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:51:08 PM

Key Boardla Key Irrukkum Anna Mother Boardla Mother Irrukkuma

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:51:48 PM

Nee Evalo Periya Padipalliya Irundhalum Exam Hall La Poi Padikka Mudiyadhu

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:52:09 PM

School Testla Bit Adikkalaam......... College Testla Bit Adikkalaam....... Aannaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa Blood Testla Bit Adikka Mudiyaadhu

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:52:36 PM

Enna Than Naai Nandri Ullatha Than Irunthalum Athala Thank You Solla Mudeyathu!!!!!!!! Idhuthan Valkai

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:53:11 PM

Lunch Bagla Lunch Kondu Poha Mudiyum... But School Bagla Shoola Kondu Pohamudiyumaaaa

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:53:34 PM

Aayiram Than Irundhalum Aayirathi Onnu Than Perusu

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:54:08 PM

Yennathan Ahimsavathiya Irundhalum
Chappathiya Suttu Than Sappida Mudiyum..

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:54:30 PM

Ni Enna Than Veerana Irundhalum,
Kulir Adicha Thirumba Adikka Mudiyathu..

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:55:01 PM

Kovil Maniya Namma Adicha Saththam Varum...
Aana Kovil Mani Nammala Adicha Raththam Than Varum

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:55:29 PM

Meluga Vachchu Melugu Vathi Seyyalam...
Aana Kosuva Vachi Kosu Vathi Seyya Mudiyathu..

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:55:51 PM

Pallu Valina Palla Pudungalam Aana Kannu Valina Kanna Pudunga Mudiyuma

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:56:19 PM

Idly Podiya Thotu Idly Saapidalaam
Aana Mooku Podiya Thotu Mooka Saapida Mudiyathu

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:56:41 PM

Kadamaiya sei Palanai ethir paakkathe! ithu Geethaiyil sonnathu Kaathal sei kalyanam seiyathe Ithu Boathaiyil sonathu.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:57:12 PM

Nee, Nilavai parthal kadavulin alagu puriyum...Suriyanai Parthal kadavulin Sakthi puriyum...Nee kannadiyai paarthal kadavulin Thappu puriyum.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:57:48 PM

Povukul theyn, Nellukul Arishi, Mannukul Vairam, "Un manasa Thottu sollu? Un Mandaikul kaliman thaney!!!!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:58:26 PM

Bakery shop: Paarthiban; Unga kadaila ella bannum kidaikkuma? vadivel: Amaa...Paarthiban: ok 1kg ribbon 1kg carbon kodu...

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 10:59:49 PM

Professor: Ulagam oru nadaga madai athil namellam nadikargal. Student: sie enakku yaara jodiya posuveega sir....

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 11:00:32 PM

Sardar 1: I spoke to Sania Mirza yesterday on the phone . Sardar 2 : thats great. What did she say? Sardar 1: Wrong number.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 11:01:07 PM

Think different do different.. Make different... Achieve different... Spead different...Then only you can goto Metal Hospital.....

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 11:01:47 PM

Picha edupathu Eppadi????...picha eduka ivlo aasaiya! sollave illa..

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 11:02:17 PM

amitha-ku 5 vaisu irukupothu avanga parents epadi koopitirupanga? ...Romba mukkiyam. poi velaya parunga._

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 11:02:51 PM

Vadivel: Yennappa idly chillunu irukku? Parthiban: Boardla yenna pottu irukku.. vadivel: Ariya Bhawan Parthiban: Appurum enna suudava erukkum! koyyla

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 11:03:17 PM

Latest thirukural 'Beedi" yal sutta pun Ullaarum Aarathae 'Brandy' Yaal Vendha vayiru" send this sms to 10 'kudimagan' you will get a "Quater" Free...

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 11:08:18 PM

Kambi1 kambi2 kambi3 kambi4 kambi5 kambi6 kambi7 kambi8 kambi9 Ha ha ha ha........... Eppadi Unna plan panni kambi enna Vachen Pathiya.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 11:08:47 PM

Sardar: "This book is very bore. More characters but no story" Librarian: " Vaadaa... Vaa.. Neethan Telephone directorya thoookitu ponavana? ...

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 11:17:39 PM

Oru Vidukathai sollattumaa.... "Thagara pettikkul mogini pisasukal" AdhuYenna....? Theriyalayaa..? Adhu LADIES college bus....

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 11:17:59 PM

Pricipal: Eanda late?; Student: Bike puncture/repair sir; Principal: Busla varrathu thane?; Student: Bus vaanga kaasu illa sir

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 11:18:19 PM

Sar: Excuesme, vaigai exp poiducha? T.T.E:; No. Sar: Pandian? T.T.E: No. Sar::Nellai? T.T.E: No, sir..Neeng yeng poganum? Sar:: "Intha Thandavalatha thaandi poganum.........

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 11:19:07 PM

Sardar: 50 rupees iruntha kadana kodunga...! Man: Panam suthama illeenga.! Sardar: Paravayilla, Alukka irunthalum kodunga..!..

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 11:19:33 PM

Girl: Darling Nenga Enditta Eathai Parthu Love Pannuneenga..? Boy: Darling Innum Eathaiyum Parkkala..! Parkkalamnu Thaan Love Pandren chellam..!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 11:20:48 PM

Lights went off in girls hostel the watchman galled up TNEB office and says " Send your men immediately because the Girls are using candles.....

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 24, 2011, 11:26:41 PM

Naan yen unnai Ninaikiren? Un kuda Pesuren? Unakku msg Pannuren? Athai yen nee padikkirai BECAuse " Namma rendu perukkume vera vela illa....

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 04:35:11 AM

Figure illanna college waste sugar illanna coffe waste. Love illanna life waste. Moon illana sky waste. Chellam Nee illana ....Zoo waste!....

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 04:36:08 AM

Dog likes BONE. Elephant likes BANANA . Ant likes Sugar. Cow likes Grass. And monkey likes what...? ............................Solluppa unaku enna pidikum......

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 04:36:55 AM

Gathered in a large hall, an angel asked us to write down our sins before entering the heaven. Before I could start wrting I heard you shouting "Addtional Sheets Please!!!"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 04:37:17 AM

Manasu sariuyillenu doctor kitta ponen, Test panittu oru loosudu sms annupu sariyagidumnu sonnar. Neeye sollu da enakku unna vitta yara therium?..

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 04:37:50 AM

Manasu sariuyillenu doctor kitta ponen, Test panittu oru loosudu sms annupu sariyagidumnu sonnar. Neeye sollu da enakku unna vitta yara therium?..

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 04:38:12 AM

Oru kaakitham 2 mins erinju chaambal ayirum, 1 kattai 10 mins erinju chaambal ayirum, 1 maram 2 hrs erinju chaambal ayirum, aana..................aaaaaaanaaaaa...... i bulb evalavu neram erinjaalum chaambal akirathu illai... how is it... ippadithaan.. puthusu puthusaa yosikkanum

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 04:38:34 AM

Oru paiyan road-la pOkumpOthu, thummikkittae pOnaan.... Yeannu kEattaaa avan cholraan, avan oru PODI paiyanaam..... ayyoooo... ayyooooo....

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 04:38:57 AM

Lifela 6 visayam eppa varumnu namkey theriyathui 1. Inbam 2. Thunbam 3. Natpu 4 Kaadhal 5. Maranam. 6. Ennodasms

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 04:39:43 AM

Friend: Naan ethu chenchaalum ennodo wife kurukka nikkiraa... Friend2: Car Otty paaren...

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 04:43:29 AM

Salesman: Sir erumbbu powder vaankikkittu ponga.... Sardar: vEndaam, innaikku erumbbukku powder vaangittu pOnaa.. athu nazhaikku lips-stick kEtkkum...

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 04:45:11 AM

Oruvar: Enunga.. oru kaalla blue color socksum matrtra kaalla brown color saaksum pOttu irukeenga.. yEn? Matravar: athuthaan yenakkum puriyala.. veetlayum ithE mathiri oru Jodi irukku!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 04:46:36 AM

Vaathiyaar: amerikkaava kandu pudichathu yaaru? Maanavan: muthalla amerikkaava oLichichi vachathu yaarunnu chollunga

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 04:56:30 AM

thanka cheina urikkinaa thangam varum... veLLi cheyinna urukkunaa VeLLi varum... appa... cycle chainna urukkinaa cycle varumaaaa?

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 04:58:06 AM

Manthiri: ArasE, pakkaththu naattu mannan namakku pOr thoduththu varuvathaaka SMS anupiyirukkirAn. Arasar: 'Message sending failed'nu nee thiruppi oru SMS koduththudu, SMS anupalannu avan kuzhampipPokattum...

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 04:58:30 AM

One day one boy and girl late to school. Teacher Asked Girl why were late, Girl: Sir i have lost my 1 rupee coin on the way while i am coming to school, i had searched for that for that i got late. Teacher asked boy why were u late, Boy says i am i am standing on that coin to hide.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 04:59:00 AM

TEA STRONG AA IRUKA YENA PANANUM? ORU SPOON "CEMENT" PODANUM.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 05:02:47 AM

Man 1: Oru nimishathula 130 name solla mudiyuma? Man 2: Mudiyadhu, niye sollu... Man 1: 100mohmed, 9thara, 6mugam, 7malai, 5ali, and 3sha. kooti PARU KANAKU SARIA VARUM

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 05:03:18 AM

Hai! E Sollu!! E e e Sollu!! E e e e e e Sollu!! Nalla e e e e Sollu!! (Leave some spacing) ilichadhu podhum po poi palla velakkuga... Good MoRnInG...Have a nice day...

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 05:06:17 AM

Love Marriage ikkum, Arrange marriage ikkum enna difference?? naamala kenuthula viluntha athu love marriage... 10 per thalli vitta athu arranged marriage..

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 05:06:44 AM

Idi.. Minnal.. Mazhai.. puyal.. Vellam.. Poogambam.. ethu nadanthalum east.. west.. north.. south..enga irunthaalum, entha sim pottirunthaalum ennoda sms suma gilli...gilli....gilli maathiri vanthu GOOD Morning sollum..Hava a nice Day...

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 05:07:08 AM

"Muruganukku" Mottai podu, "Perumalukku" Naamam Podu, "Jesus"ku siluvai podu. My chellam, nee daily "jatti"podu, Marakkama "thovachi podu"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 05:07:36 AM

Vadivelu: Hello, enna ithu? 601 ruba kadan vaangitu 106 ruba thareenga? Parthiban: Ithuthan kasana THIRUPPI tharadhu......

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 05:07:57 AM

Thooka marundhu sappitta thookam varum... Anaa...Irumal marundhu sappitta irumal varathu! (Enna kodumai saaar idhu

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 05:08:17 AM

neering Collegela padichu Engineer aagalaam, Presidency collegela padichu president aaga mudiyumaa?!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 05:08:38 AM

U cant imagin ppl do.IN TEMPLE ONE PERSON - in middle of the arthi he lit a ciggratte,i really shocked i dropd the beer*

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 05:09:04 AM

Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do? usband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes..!!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 05:09:28 AM

Son: Mummy, Night Bathroom Door Open Panna,Thanaa Light Eriyudhu. Mother: vaada.... Saniyane, Fridge'la urine Ponadhu Neethana?..

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 25, 2011, 05:09:52 AM

If your don't like dirty msg, don't read this........... A white dog fell into the mud... became so dirty!!! ha ha....

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:32:22 PM

/////\\
/// E I D \
//MUBARAK\
Aap soch rahe hon gay abi eid ko 5 din baqi hain,
Lekin
Ya
To
Socho
Hamara sms jis ko mil jata hai samjho us ki to eid ho gai
So
/////\\
/// E I D \
//MUBARAK\

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:32:46 PM

With gleam of Diyas
And the Echo of the Chants
May Happiness and Contentment Fill Your life
Wishing you a very happy and prosperous Diwali!!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:33:07 PM

I wish you ALL a very happy and peaceful Eid.
May Allah accept your good deeds,
forgive your transgressions and ease
the suffering of all peoples around the globe.
Eid Mubarak

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:33:30 PM

24 SmileS..

:-)
:-):-)
:-):-):-)
:-):-):-):-)
:-) :-) :-) :-)
:-):-):-):-)
:-):-):-)
:-):-)
:-)

For You,

One For Each Hour.!
So ThaT You Keep SMiLiNG 24 HOURS At EiD DaY..

[::. EiD MuBArAK .::]

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:34:10 PM

HaPpY Eid MubariK

I know its too early...
but l have hundreds of boys and pretty girls to wish...
So I decided to finish off Uncles & Aunties first!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:34:32 PM

l''l________
--/ l__l Delivery
| | ________
L(o)__l___(o)__|
This van is loaded with
LOVE n CARE,
Wishing U and your family
A HAPPY DIWALI

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:34:57 PM

I Pray to God to give U
Shanti,
Shakti,
Sampati,
Swarup,
Saiyam,
Saadgi,
Safalta,
Samridhi,
Sanskar,
Swaasth,
Sanmaan,
Saraswati,
aur SNEH.
SHUBH DIWALI...

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:35:22 PM

It Is Time To Feel Good,
Time 4 Reunion,
Time 2 Share Happiness,
Time To Feel Being Loved,
Time 2 Show Ur Love,
Time 2 Live For Others And
Time To Wish For Peace.
HAPPY DIWALI. Cheeeeeers

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:35:52 PM

A festival full of sweet childhood memories,
sky full of fireworks,
mouth full of sweets,
house full of diyas and heart full of joy.
Wishing you all a very happy Diwali!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:36:13 PM

May millions of lamps illuminate ur life
with endless joy,prosperity,health & wealth forever
Wishing u and ur family a very
"HAPPY DIWALI"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:36:33 PM

Delightful laddos
Incandecent diyas
Whole lot of fun
A big stock of masti
Lots of mithai
Innemurable fireworks
Wishing you the best bargain
on fun n
lots of sale-e-bration
have an enjoyable diwali mela

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:36:57 PM

May This Diwali be as bright as ever.
May this Diwali bring joy, health and wealth to you.
May the festival of lights brighten up you and your near and dear ones lives.
May this Diwali bring in u the most brightest and choicest happiness and love you have ever Wished for.
May this Diwali bring you the utmost in peace and prosperity.
May lights triumph over darkness.
May peace transcend the earth.
May the spirit of light illuminate the world.
May the light that we celebrate at Diwali show us the way and lead us together on the path of peace and social harmony
“WISH U A VERY HAPPY DIWALI”

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:38:06 PM

This Diwali I Am Sending You CASH:
C-Care
A-Affection
S-Smiles
H-Hugs
* HAPPY DIWALI *

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:38:25 PM

Paying respects to the God,
And decorating for them the thali,

This is what the occasion is all about,
This is the spirit of Deepavali.......

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:38:49 PM

Let's celebrate the auspicious day of Diwali with fun and frolic
May this bright day bring Bountiful Bliss and Joy in your life
Here's sending wishes to you on this Diwali.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:39:11 PM

May Goddess Lakshmi And Lord Ganesha bless you
With happiness Progress and prosperty
On Diwali and In the year ahead !

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:39:49 PM

On this auspicious
Festival of lights
May the glow of joys
Prosperity and happiness
Alluminate your days
In the year ahead
HAPPY DIWALI.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:40:36 PM

Light a lamp of love!
Blast a chain of sorrow!
Shoot a rocket of prosperity!
Fire a flowerpot of happiness!
Wish u and your family SPARKLING DIWALI

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:41:00 PM

Let's overcome the darkness and celebrate the victory of the good over the evil
with the light of our Diyas, with good faith, our prayers to Lakshmi and Ganesh,
our offerings to Gods and Goddesses, with the joyful happiness and warmth of our hearts,
our families and beloved ones.
Remember that Diwali is what we make it!
So let's make Diwali 2011 an unforgettable one!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:41:23 PM

This SMS will EXPLODE in 5 seconds‚¦.

:05

:04

:03

:02

:01

(((((BOOM)))))

“*‚*‚*‚*‚*‚*‚
*‚*‚HAPPY‚*‚*
“*‚DIPAWALI‚*‚
‚¦.*‚*‚*‚¦.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:41:49 PM

May the good times and treasures of the present
become the golden memories of tomorrow.
Wish you lots of love, joy and happiness.
MARRY CHRISTMAS

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:42:10 PM

Special dua 4 special person:
May
Allah almighty bless u with
Sehat,
Rahat,
Nemat,
Izzat,
Barkat,
Dault,
Salamti,
Hayati,
Kamyabi &
unlimited khushiyan :)

EID MUBARAK

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:42:30 PM

Eid...
A time for joy,
a time for togetherness,
a time to remember my blessings..

For me... it's you!

May Allah Bless you &
Give u all the joy u bring to my life!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:43:14 PM

Wishing u happy Eid,
soft as silk,
white as milk,
sweet as honey,
full of money
and
bubli as u

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:43:42 PM

O Allah, forgive me all my sins
Great and small,
The first and the last
those that are apparent
and
those that are hidden.
Ameen

Jummah Mubarak

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:44:00 PM

Broken Trust is like a melted Chocolate,
No matter how u tried to freeze it,
it will never return to its original Shape..!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:44:23 PM

Side effect of excess study :p
A Guy Went To A Restaurant,
He Wanted To See The Menu
But He Forgot WhAt It Is Called;

He Asked Waiter,
"Syllabus Lana Zara":-P

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:44:46 PM

GIRLS STUPIDITY!!
.
.
.
.
.
.
They wont even give their phone no.
even to a KNOWN person
.
But they give all their PRIVATE details
to an UNKNOWN TAILOR :p

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:45:05 PM

7 days
168 hours
10080 minutes
604800 seconds are left..
I think i am the first person to
wish U HAPPY DIWALI..

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:45:27 PM

Life Becomes Romantic When Eyes Start Looking
At S0me 1 Silently ..

But

Life Becomes More R0mantic When Some 1
Starts Reading Those Eyes Silently

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:45:46 PM

Did You Know . . .?
That
"HEELS" Are Man's Invention
.
.
.
.
.
.
To Make It Harder For A
Woman To Run Away. ;)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:46:12 PM

There are Two Ways To Rule a Girl / Women
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
And nobody knows them.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:46:34 PM

boy: how do i play the guitar????
girl: u should be on TV for ur talent :|
boy: am i so good??? :D :O

girl: if u were on TV,, i can atleast switch it off ;/

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:46:57 PM

‎6 year old boy : I love you mom !!!

Mom : awww..! I love you too!
.
.
.
.
17 year old boy : I love you mom!

Mom : sorry, I have no money!!! :d

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:47:24 PM

That Boy N Girl

They Fight About
A Lot Of Things ,

But They Love All Of
The Same Music

She's Immature,
But He Accepts Her Silliness

They Both Say
They Hate Each Other
But
Secretly R Happy
When People Tell Them That
They Would Make A
Good Couple

They Act Like
They are Nothing More Than Friends
But Everyone Knows Otherwise.

When People Ask...
They Say They Don't Like Each Other
But
Still Hope That The Other One Is Lying

She's A Writer ,
But
He's A Football Player

She's More Beautiful Than
She'll Ever Know
But
He Already Does

They Are Completely Different
But
They Are Absolutely
Perfect For Each Other

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:47:59 PM

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:48:20 PM

With my
1 heart
2 eyes
7 liter blood
206 bones
4.5 million red cells
60 trillion D N A"S...
All wishing you a very very
HAPPY DIWALI!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:48:44 PM

When You "Wait" For A Waiter In A Restaurant,
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Aren't You The Waiter?:

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:49:05 PM

|-----------|
| '--.__.--' | Here is
|-----------| my
GREETING CARD 4 you.
Kindly open it....

$========$
( HAPPY (
( DIWALI (
) & )
( Prosperous )
( New Year )

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:49:30 PM

It is very tough to believe a stranger,
But if someone loves U more than Fish loves Water,
Holds UR hand tight with tears in his eyes & says,

"The moment I saw U
I fell in love with U
I can't live without U
& wanna spend the rest of my life with U
I LOVE U "

What will U reply ?

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:49:51 PM

"A HEART die's when
it is not able to share's its FEELINGS...,

But a HEART Kills itself when
another Heart does not Understands its Feelings

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:50:10 PM

Words of Lover Boy:
My eyes know that
i m not perfect match 4 him.
But
my heart has no eyes or ears,
So it's been beating 4 her..

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:50:37 PM

There Will Always Be That 0ne Person
Who Love You
Because
You're Not Like Anyone Else

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:50:58 PM

"I Don't TRUST Easily
Because The People
I Have Trusted In The Past Gave Me
A Reason Not To. .

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:51:18 PM

At Some Point,
You Have To Realize That
Some People Can Stay In Your Heart,
But Not In Your Life...

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:51:40 PM

A Journey Of A Thousand
Miles Begins With A Single Step.

Then,
You Get In A Car
And Go To The Airport.

It Doesn't Take That Long :

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:52:27 PM

Sunglasses:
Allowing You To Stare At
People Without Getting
Caught.
It's Like Facebook In Real Life.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:54:31 PM

Why Government do NOT
allow a Man to MARRY 2 Women.

Because per Constitution,
you can NOT BE PUNISHED TWICE
for the same Mistake.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:54:51 PM

When the sun has set, and day is done
I'll break this chain, but only one.
By the end of Ramadan,
It's time for Eid and lots of fun!!!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:55:11 PM

U fasted,u prayed,
U been good 4 a whole 30 days.
So ur merciful ALLAH gave u a sign,
Out came the moon 2 say come celebrate..
Happy Eid mubarak

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:55:32 PM

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:55:52 PM

Doctor: sorry , reports got mixed up.
We don't know if your wife has AIDS or Asthma!

husband: What should i do now?

Doctor - Send her 4 jogging,
if she returns, don't sleep with her!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:56:12 PM

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:56:57 PM

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:57:18 PM

‎Girls are like apples on trees.
The best ones are at the top of the tree.
The boys don't want to reach
for the good ones because they
r afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples up top think
something wrong with them when in
reality they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to climb all
the way to the top of the tree

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:57:44 PM

True Love Is When A Boy Ask The Girl
For A 'Kiss' And The Girl Simply Close Her Eyes
And Allow The Boy For A 'Kiss'
But The Boy "Kisses" On "Forehead

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:58:11 PM

What is the perfect example
of both Good & Bad Luck?

The naughty wind blows the girl's skirt high (Good luck)

but at the same time

Dust falls into the boy's eyes (Bad luck)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:58:34 PM

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:58:54 PM

A Big Pond Full of Water
can be Emptied by a Small Hole

Similarly A Little Doubt / Disrespect / Ego / Anger
can Burn up Strong Relationship

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 27, 2011, 11:59:32 PM

Rain Is Irritating If You Are Getting Wet Alone!:(
Pizza Is Just Some Junk Food If There Are No More Than A Pair Of Hands Picking It Up!:(
Beach Is Th Dirtiest Place When There Is No One To Hold N Walk By The Side!:(
Songs R Just A Time Pass If They Doesn't Remind You Of Someone
No Matter How Short Life Is

Live It With Your Beloved Ones
Share Every Second
Love N Be Loved !!!
May Ur Real Friends and Loved one Be With U Ever
Take Care!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 09:23:58 PM

Someday you may lose your hair.
you may lose your teeth- oyur money & even lose your mind.
But 1 thing you will never loose is oyur good looks.
because you cant lose what you don't have!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 09:24:35 PM

Yash Johar is producing a new film
& is searching 4 new talent.
I've suggested ur name.
Pls go & meet him.
The movie's name is "AQAL HO NA HO"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 09:25:38 PM

Promise me we are true friends
I am lamp you are light
I am Coke you are Sprite
I am Sawan you are badal
I am Normal you are Pagal
I am Water you are Tanki
I am Tarzan you are Monkey

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 09:26:06 PM

A girl ask to moulvi! can i kiss a man?
moulvi says: astaghfirullah! astaghfirullah!

girl: can i kiss a boy?
moulvi: laahulawala quwata.........

girl: can i kiss u?
moulvi: Bismillahh bismillah

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 09:26:35 PM

2 sardar were fixing a bomb in a car.
Sardar 1 : What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.
sardar 2 : Don't worry, I have a one more.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 09:27:54 PM

On a romantic day sardar's girlfriend asks him,
"Darling on our engagement day will you give me a ring?"
Sardar : "Ya sure, from landline or mobile".

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 09:40:40 PM

Hey friend remember that
without stupidity there can be no wisdom
& without ugliness there can be no beauty
so the world needs YOU after all!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 09:41:06 PM

A scientist cannot b a president,but kalam did it.
A conductor cannot b a superstar,but Rajini did it.
A monkey cannot operate mobile,
but u mere lal, mind blowing..... (u did it)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 09:46:20 PM

Doctor to sardar : You will die within 2 hours.
Do you want to see any one before you die?
Sardar : Yes. A good doctor.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 09:46:49 PM

Sardar was busy removing
a wheel from his auto.
A man asks sardar why are
you removing a wheel from your auto.
sardar : Cant you read the board.
Parking is only for 2 wheeler

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 09:47:15 PM

Sardar joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the computer.
Boss was happy and asked "what you did till evening?"
Sardar :"Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 09:48:15 PM

Who was d 1st indian cricktr 2 Bcum captain in his 1st mtch,score century in d same mtch &hit a 6 of d last ball 2 defeat england? AAMIR KHAN in LAGAAN

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 09:48:41 PM

A newly married girl got first class in her B.Ed exams. Her husband sent telegram to her parents - Ruby First Class in Bed!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 09:59:47 PM

A Sardar saw a Beautiful Girl,he Went and Kissed her.
Girl: "STUPID what r u doing?"
Sardar: B.Com final year"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:00:11 PM

Friends r like fishes.
U have to sit patiently for a long time
to catch a good one.
Just like I caught u.
so better stay nice otherwise
I will FRY YOU..;)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:01:15 PM

Once, Boss, Officer & Clerk going 4 a meeting.
They saw a Jin.
Jin said: As i fulfill 3 wishes at a time
But u r 3 persons so i will fulfill 1 wish for each.

Clerk said: Send me to America with a lot of money clerk disappears. (wish fulfilled)
Officer said: Send me to Paris with a lot of beautiful girls. officer disappears. (wish fulfilled)
Jin said to Boss: what is ur wish?
He said: "I want these two idiots back at office after lunch."
Moral: Always Let the BOSS SPEAK 1st

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:01:41 PM

A baby mosquito came back after its 1st fight.
.
.
.
Dad asked: "how did u feel?"
.
.
.
It replied: "Dad it was wonderful. evry1 ws clappin 4 me"

Moral: Take evrything positively

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:02:10 PM

Once an old man was waiting for a train, sitting on a bench.
A young boy came to him and asked the time.
Old man refused to tell the time.
Boy insisted again & again but old man denied again & again.
Boy asked the reason?
Old man said if i tell you the time,
then you will ask about me,my name,job etc.
Then i will ask about you,both of us will be frank.
By chance you may get the seat with me.
Then you may get down at my station.
My daughter will come to receive me.
She will meet you. She is beautiful.
You may fall in love with her,she too.
Then she may insist to marry u, even may threaten me.
And i am sorry that
I dont want such a poor son in law
who hasn't his own watch to see the time. ;-) :)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:02:38 PM

Breaking News
ATM @ Gulshan-e-Iqbal Is Jammed &
Not In Working Condition
.
.
.
Because
.
.
.
Sardar's Wife Put Hair pin In Machine
When It Said", Enter Ur PIN" ;)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:03:12 PM

Worlds shortest jokes:

1) 2 Women r sitting quiet.

2) 2 Sardars r playing chess.

3) GirlFriend pays the bill...!!!

Need more???

U r beautiful.:-P

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:05:17 PM

TEACHER:
what is the different between
problem and challenge????

STUDENT:3boys+1girl=problem
1boy+3girls=challenge..

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:05:46 PM

Mr.Bean Science
.
Major Rohail:
I was stuck in ELEVATOR for 3 hrs
Due to electric failure

Mr.Bean:
Ya me too
I was stuck on ESCALATOR for 5 hrs

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:06:43 PM

Q: What is the difference b/w secretary & private secretary?

Ans:
Secretary says GOOD MORNING SIR
&
Private secretary says ITS MORNING SIR

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:07:10 PM

A ship was sinking.
Captain: Does any one know how to pray?
A priest comes forward and says he can pray.
Captain: Ok priest, you pray;
Everyone else in ship will wear a life jacket
as we are one jacket short.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:07:36 PM

2 men were searching for their lost wife in a festival.
Banta: What does your wife look like?
Santa: She is 5'7", 36-24-36 sexy figure,
fair, sweet, beautiful, green sexy eyes, brown hair, and yours?

Banta: Forget mine, let us look for yours.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:08:01 PM

TERROR JOKE -
What will happen
if u throw an AMPLIFIER into the sea?
TSUNAMI will be created
since an amplifier converts
small waves into bigger wave.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:10:30 PM

5 points that prove you are a normal student

1:unnecessary talk on phone and messages
2:Plan each day to study but end of the day KAL SAY PAKA
3:you have all the data but you work before the dead line
4:right now you are thinking of forwarding this message to your friends
5:on each point you smile because it's true.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:10:56 PM

When I open my eyes every morning
I pray to God that everyone should
have a friend like you....
Why should only i suffer!!! ha ha ha

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:11:27 PM

Hi i am marrying next week
there will be a small party and
only few persons will be invited
Hey don't bring any gift
just bring SOMEONE to marry me.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:11:57 PM

Sardar: Will U marry , after I die.
Wife : No I will live with my sister.

Wife : Will U marry , after I die.
Sardar: No I will also live with ur sister.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:12:22 PM

Future plans of childrens:
Teacher asks children, what do u wish 2 do in future?
Adnan: I want 2 b a pilot.
Wakeel: I want 2 b a doctor.
Bina: I want 2 b a good mother.
Shariq : I want 2 help Bina.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:12:53 PM

A man was telling his neighbor,
€I just bought a new hearing aid.
It cost me four thousand dollars,
but it€™s state of the art. It€™s perfect.€

€Really,€ answered the neighbor .
€What kind is it?€
MAN:€Twelve thirty.€

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:13:27 PM

I always think about U.
I can't live without U.
I really need U.
I'm totally mad about U.
I just wanna be with U.
I'm very desperate for U.
I'm crazy 4 U.
I wanna marry U.
I LOVE U.
That's all what my mama say to me:p

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:14:01 PM

If:-
R u emotionally dumbed
Creatively challenged?
Artistically void?
Socially hopeless?
And financially desperate?

Congrats you are a
PAKISTANI!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:21:25 PM

Choose four

Select three

Love two

And

Marry one

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:21:54 PM

On Ur Single Smile Thousands People Die So

Keep Smiling n

Reduce Population Of PAKISTAN

But.

Never Smile In Front Of Da Mirror

Warna

Lene K Dene Par Jayen Gay.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:22:45 PM

a girl's speaking 2 a boy........
u r very handsome.
u r very cute.
u r very sweet.
ooph.......sorry.
i can't call u sweet....
because ants will finish u.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:23:15 PM

UNIVERSAL TRUTH :

When girls wear tight fittings,
Neither they are
Comfortable

Nor

Boys are comfortable‚¦. !!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:23:39 PM

In our life time
6 things can come at any time:
1.love
2.friendship
3.money
4.death
5.illness
-
-
-
6.susu: isliye karke sona .

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:24:12 PM

What was GOD's First Reaction
when he made a Negro(African)?

Socho...

Dont know..

Oh! shit jal gaya!!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:25:23 PM

Sardar : What is the name of your car ?
Lady : I forgot the name, but is starts with "T".
Sardar : Oye Kamaal ki gaadi hai, Tea se start hoti hai.
Hamaara gaadi petrol se start hoti hai.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:27:59 PM

An Aeroplane asks a Rocket
How is that you can fly so fast?
The Rocket replies you will know the pain
when they put fire at your back!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:28:31 PM

Gal: Do u have any sentimental love cards?

Shopkeeper: How about this card,
it says,"To the only boy I ever loved!"

Gal: Great! I want 10 of them

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:29:03 PM

Y do couples hold hands during their wedding?

Its a formality just like two boxers
shaking hands before the fight begins!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:29:27 PM

How will a rat purpose a cat...??
?
..??
?
"Billo Rani Kaho Tou Abhi Jaan De Doon..
O Billo Rani..!!;-)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:30:24 PM

when sum1 touches u
&
u don't feel it,
its IGNORANCE.

When sum1 touches u
&
u feel it, its LOVE.

but when nobody touches
u but u feel it, then its KHUJLI;-)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:30:49 PM

Positive-thinking poem:

Little bird in the sky
Droping shit into ur eye

U don't worry u don't cry,
U just thank God that,

Cows do not fly

Always b positive

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:31:19 PM

Moral of the movie Ghajini...

Whenever going to meet your girlfriend
Make sure u have your cell phone..
n
when u r in deep trouble
keep your cell phone silent...

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:32:21 PM

Can u dance?
?
?
?
No!
.
.
.
Sure
.
.
.
Just try it
.
.
.
Sure u cant
.
.
.
That means u r pappu!!!
.
.
.
Because pappu cant dance ..

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:33:28 PM

Teacher: How Do You Differentiate
"WIFE" & "MOTHER"

SARDAR:
Before Marriage We Sleep With "MOTHER"
&
After Marriage
We Sleep With Our "WIFE"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:33:54 PM

Sumeone Kills AMIR'S GF
& He Loses His Memory.
Than He Tries To Find out D Killer.
Suspense:AMIR Himself Is D Killer.
Now Enjoy Watchng GHAJINI :P

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:34:20 PM

Teacher: what is meant by
"I MISS YOU"
.
.
.
.
Pathan: Is ka matlab hai
"Mein tumhari miss hon!"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:34:46 PM

When a girl falls down
She is helped by so
Many people
But
When a boy falls down
Everybody laughs

When a girl licks
Her lips
She is thirsty
When boy licks
His lips
He is tharki

When a girl smiles
She is considered cute
When a boy smiles
He is flirt

Still people say
This is men's world

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:36:18 PM

Judge: why r u arrested?
Sardar: for shopping early?
Judge: well, that's not a crime,
anyway how early were u shopping?

Sardar: before opening the shop.....:p

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:37:25 PM

Life while doing m.b.b.s

1sr yr: yahoo i'm in Medical college
2nd yr: kahan phans Gaya? Help me
3rd yd: severe Migraine, sometimes Pagalpan bhi
4th yr: aah soon it'll b over
5th yr: finaly it'll b over

House job: i did it
Job : i love myself

W8 a min !
Something is missing
.
.
.
.
Ohhh !!! Meri "jawani":(

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:38:33 PM

If u have 1 father, call me.
If u have 2 fathers, sms me.
If u have 3 fathers, miss call me.
If i m your father, just ignore this message.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:39:03 PM

Commerce professor asks the student:
what is the most important source
of finance for starting business?

Student: "Father in law".

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:39:30 PM

Son: Mom, when I was on the bus
with Dad this morning, he told me to
give up my seat to a lady.

Mom: Well, you have done the right thing.
Son: But mum, I was sitting on daddy's lap.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:40:07 PM

A Solid reason for having 2 girlfriends at one time:
Monopoly is always damaging
&
Competition improves service!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:40:37 PM

Send me SMS on these time

Morning
6am To 12pm

Noon
12pm To 4pm

Evening
4pm To 8pm

Night
8pm To 6am

Baki Time Tang Mat Karna
Kam Karna Hota Hai :-)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:41:47 PM

Who let you get on the horse
You witch's child?
.
.
.
.
Can't understand?
.
.
.
.
.
Tenu ghori kinnay charhaya bhootni k...:p:d

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:42:12 PM

Great Calculation: Only 20% boys have brains.
So what do the rest have?
.
.
.
.
.
They have girl friends:p

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:42:37 PM

Dad : Son, what do you want for your birthday?

Son : Not much dad,
just a radio with a sports car around it.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:43:12 PM

A love letter from biscuit maker:
Dear marie, today is good day,
u r anmol for me...
but u have crack jacked my heart,
bcoz i have a little heart,
now i m in 50/50 position...

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:44:39 PM

What does ILU means?

I= I
L= Love
U=Urdu
so I love urdu...
tum kya samjhey they...
I love ullu..
to haan mein tum say bhi pyar karta hoon

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:45:23 PM

One day Raja and rani
decided to send messages
to each other by using
Pigeon instead of mobile.
The very next day pigeon reached raja without any message.
He angried and called to rani.
She told stupid "This was a missed call"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:45:51 PM

Teacher To Student:

Can You Define Who Is LECTURER?

Student : A LECTURER Is A Person Who Has A Very Bad
Habit Of Speaking When Someone Is SLeeping

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:46:30 PM

Father to son:
whenever i beat you,
you dont get annoyed,
how you control your anger?

son: i start cleaning the toilet
seat with your toothbrush

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:47:04 PM

What is a girl friend?

Addition of problems,
subtraction of money,
multiplication of enemies
&
division of friends.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:48:49 PM

Girl: When we get married,
I want to share all your worries,
troubles and lighten your burden.

Boy: It's very kind of you,
darling, But I don't have any worries or troubles.

Girl: Well that is because we aren't married yet.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:49:13 PM

A girl & boy were sitting alone,
that boy started touching de girl,

Girl : dont touch me, all this only after marriage.

Boy : ok call me when u r married.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 10:49:47 PM

In art gallery couple sees
picture of a girl covered by leaf.
Husband keeps watching.

Wife: ab chalo gay ya PAT JHARR
ka intezar kertay raho gay.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 11:14:17 PM

What is the difference between
a woman and a magnet?

Magnets have a positive side!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 11:14:50 PM

Full form of maths

M=mentally
A=admited
T=teacher
H=harassing
S=students

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 11:15:20 PM

If I was an artist,
you would be my picture!
If I was a poet,
you would be my inspiration!
If I was an author you would be my story!

But I'm only a cartoonist!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 11:15:54 PM

What is the difference between
a woman and a magnet?

Magnets have a positive side!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 11:17:04 PM

Q: Do u knw y in a couple's photo
man is on d right side & woman on d left?
A: Coz as per balance sheet,Liabilities r on d
Left Side & Assets on d Right!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 11:17:29 PM

Tom : How should I convey the
news to my father that I've failed?

David: You just send a telegram:
Result declared, past year's performance repeated.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 11:17:57 PM

Girlfriend & Police
Main Kia Baat Common Hay ???
.
.
.
.
.
socho !
.
.
.
.
.
.
socho !
.
.
.
.
.
.
Aur Socho !
.
.
.
.
Donoo Hi Paisa Kha Kr
Chor Dete Hain !:p

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 11:18:56 PM

Three ants find an elephant asleep.
One says,"We'll kill him!"
Other one says,"We'll break his legs!"
3rd one says:
"choro yaar bechara akela hai aur hum teen..!!":-)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 11:20:21 PM

Americans make a car
& 2 get some touch ups
They snd it 2 Japan
& they add a faster engine
Thn Japan sent it 2 UK
Who then added tinted windows
Who thn sent d car to China.
They added a better interior.
Thn they sent it 2 Pakistan.
Pakistani luk @ d car & see
What a good job all of them have done.
So they flip the car over
&
Put a stamp on MADE IN PAKISTAN

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 11:20:46 PM

TEACHER: Arshad, name one important thing
we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.

Arshad: Me!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 11:21:08 PM

I wrote your name on sand,
it got washed.

I wrote your name in air,
it was blown away.

I wrote your name on my heart &
i got Heart Attack.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 11:22:04 PM

Our friendship means a lot to me.
U cry i cry.
U laugh i laugh.
U jump out of the window
I look down & then
.
.
.
I laugh again

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 11:22:28 PM

The 1st Advice Of
Father To His Son
When Son Got His
Driving License Made,
Is
"Remember 1 Thing Son
If U're Going To Hit
Anything, Make Sure
Its Cheap"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 11:22:56 PM

Man 1:
"I m Always Delighted
When People Stick Their
Noses In My
Business."

Man 2:
"Why, What Do You Do?"

Man 1:
"i've A Company, Make
Tissue Papers ..." ;->

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 11:23:25 PM

What Happens When
The Elephant Sat On
The Mercedes Car ... ???
.
.
.
.
Everyone Knows
"The Mercedes bends" ;->

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 28, 2011, 11:23:58 PM

Girlfriend: And are you sure
you love me and no one else?

Boyfriend: Dead Sure!
I checked the whole list again yesterday

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 09:51:36 PM

Astronomers say
"The universe is Finite..."
Which is a comforting
Thought
For those people ,
Who cannot remember
Where they leave Things

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 09:51:56 PM

Husband: You know,
our son got his brain from me.

Wife: I think he did ,
I still got mine with me!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 09:52:57 PM

When I was born
Devil said...Oh Shit!!!
Another GOOD PERSON!!!..
&
When u were born devil said ...
Oh Shit!!!!Competition...!!! ....

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 09:54:34 PM

Have a horrible day without water in ur bathroom,
while soap in ur eyes.
Oh!sorry, dis msg is not 4 u.
Its only 4 those who do not take bath everyday...

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 09:54:56 PM

If you need advice,
text me...
If you need a friend,
call me...
If you need me,
come to me...
But
If you need money.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
THE SUBSCRIBER CANNOT BE REACHED!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 09:55:51 PM

Man:Doctor ! My Son has swallowed a key.
Doctor: When ?
Man:Three Months Ago
Doctor: What were you doing till now?
Man: We were using duplicate key

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 09:56:17 PM

7 Angels came 2 Me
&
asked 4 the most Inteligent,
Smart, Nice, Sweet,
Noble and Well Groomed Person.
So I gave Them Your Address
.
.
.
.
..
Dekha kesa Ullu banaya Un ko!:D

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 09:57:16 PM

U look sweet when u read my message.
U look sweeter when u read my message & smile.
U look sweetest when u read my message, smile & reply.
So, try to look sweetest.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 09:57:37 PM

We will now upgrade your brain,
please wait....
Searching....
searching...
still searching....
Sorry,
NO BRAIN found...!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 09:57:56 PM

Open with Love...
If I disturb U
I am Sorry!
But I need
To Say
I...
Love...
Disturbing you...

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 09:58:16 PM

Manager:
Sorry, but I can't give you a job.
I don't need much help.

Job Applicant: That's all right.
In fact I'm just the right person in this case.

You will see, I won't be of much help anyway!!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 09:59:00 PM

Man : How old is your father?
Boy : As old as me.

Man : How can that be?
Boy : He became a father only when I was born

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 09:59:42 PM

><(((:>
I send you this fish
as a sign of our
FRIENDSHIP please
take care of it, Keep it
in your mobile.
Daily put your mobile in water,
So dat this fish wont die

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:00:13 PM

Teacher told all students
in a class to write an essay
on a cricket match.

All were busy writing except one Sardarji.
He wrote No match, due to rain!!!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:01:23 PM

Diner: I can't eat such a rotten chicken.
Call the manager!
Waiter: It's no use. He won't eat it either.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:02:14 PM

Why Are Elephants
Large, Gray And
Wrinkly... ?
.
.
.
.
Because
.
.
.
If They Were
Small Round & White
They Would Be
''Aspirins" ;->

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:04:46 PM

An old rich man marries a young girl.
Interviewer ask to girl-
aap nay in main shadi ke liye‚ kya dekha?
girl- ek to inki income, aur doosre inke‚ din kam.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:05:15 PM

Waiter: Would you like your coffee black?
Customer: What other colors do you have?

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:05:53 PM

Boy U r d Sunshine
Of My Life !
Without U Life's Like A
Dreamy Cloud !
U r In My Heart Like A
Lovely Drizzle In d Sun !
Girl: Now Go Further
I've 2 Listen More
Weather Report :p

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:06:50 PM

What will Himesh say to magnify a picture..?
?
?
?
?
?
?
Zara Zoom Zoom... ;->

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:07:20 PM

Attitude of girls:

When a boy sends dirty sms
she laughs for 10 minutes,
forward dat to her friends n
then replies the boy.
"i dont like that kind of sms ok?" :p ;->

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:08:13 PM

Friends I'm Collecting
Quaids Photos
Give Ur Contribution
2 My Collection.
A Small Condition Is
It Must Be On
500 Or 1000 Rupees Note

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:08:34 PM

Why Did Lady Throw Out Her Mother-In-Law?
Because
Baba Ramdev (Yoga walay) Said
"Apni Saans Ko Bahar Nikalo..!!"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:08:58 PM

Think positive‚¦
Look at the world as 1 huge chocolate cake.
It would not be complete without
a few sweets & nuts.

Sweets like me & nuts like you!!!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:11:41 PM

i am a killer!
i kill poople for money,
i am a killer! i kill people for money,
but ur my friend, so i will kill u for free of cost.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:11:58 PM

He said... Do u love me just coz
my father left me a fortune?
She said... No stupid, I'd love u no matter
who left you the money!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:12:17 PM

Businessman explaining the reason for having 2 wives

"Monopoly is always damaging

&

Competition improves service".

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:12:36 PM

You are a DOG...
D = Darling
O = Of
G = Girls
Now u r smiling na?
Am i right??
Tu sach mein kutta hai

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:12:57 PM

Teacher says to student, In Algebra
A=B
&
B=C.
It means A=C.

Now give relevant example.
Student: Sir, I love you & You love your daughter,
It means that I love your daughter.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:13:15 PM

If a boy gives a love letter 2 a gal, people call him "Loffer"
But if a gal gives a letter 2 a boy, they call it "Offer".
Feel the difference

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:13:39 PM

Professor:Chemical symbol of Barium?
Sardar: BA

Professor:For sodium?
Sardar: NA

Professor:What will we get if 1 atom of BA
& 2 atoms of NA combined?
Sardar: BANANA

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:14:00 PM

Buyer to seller : is it pure honey ?
How do I know if it is pure honey ?
Seller : give the dog some honey ..
if the dog doesn't lick it, it is pure honey

Buyer :what if the dog licks it ?
Seller: so it is not a real dog.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:15:27 PM

Hitler says,
"There is no word like IMPOSSIBLE in my dictionary"
Sardar says:Ab bolne se kiya fayidah?
"Jub kharidi thi tab hi check karna tha na":D

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:15:53 PM

Thought of the day:
"if u help a gal when she is in problem,
she will always remember u
only when she is in problem again..!!"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:17:13 PM

Employer: €In this job we need someone who is responsible.€

Applicant: €I€™m the one you want.
On my last job, every time anything went wrong,
they said I was responsible.€

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:17:41 PM

A very old lady teacher of English
ask this question with the class:

When I say "I am beautiful", which tense is it?

One pupil answered: Its the past tense of course.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:18:05 PM

143 means?
Do u want to know
what it means?
Press Down..
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
It means
ONE HUNDRED AND FORTY THREE.
Tomorrow I will teach u 144.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:18:25 PM

Judge: U r crossing the limits.
Lawyer: Kaun Saala aisa kehta hai?
Judge: How dare you call me saala?
Lawyer: My Lord, I said kaun 'Sa Law' kehta hai?

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:19:15 PM

Flowers die,
Stories end,
Songs fade,
Memories are forgotten,
All things come 2 end,
But people like u r remembered forever,
Bcoz GHOSTS NEVER DIE

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:22:22 PM

1 day u'll B srprisd 2 c ME beside U.
U & ME laughing,
U & ME crying,
U & ME dreaming,
U & ME holding on,
U & ME...
just U & ME sitting in a MENTAL HOSPITAL & ME CHECKING U.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:22:50 PM

This is my head ....

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Itni dair dabanay k liyay thanks.
I am feeling much better now:-)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:23:53 PM

Hi,
Doing nothing?
Then make a place,
4 Me in ur heart!!
I may come there any time!
Urs faithfully,
Heart Attack

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:24:13 PM

A sardar prays daily for 2 hours,
"Hey vaheguru meri lottery lagady."

After 11 years VaheGuru angrily appeared
& said,"Khoti de putar 1 vari ticket te le ley"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:24:33 PM

Man standing on the scale,
holding his stomach in.
Wife:I do not think that is going to help.
Man:Sure it does. How else could I see the numbers?

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:25:17 PM

Soldier:Sir, we are surrounded!
Major:Excellent!
We can attack in any direction now!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:25:35 PM

A man sees a fat man
sitting in a train cabin.

Taunting, he asks:
Is this cabin for elephants only!

Fat man humbly replies:
No!Even monkeys like you can sit!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:25:56 PM

Major Rohail:
Dude EGGS are extra salty today€¦
Tooo much Salt..why?
.
.
Waiter:
Sir hen is suffring from high blood
Pressure

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:28:32 PM

A boy goes to see a dance.

His mom angrily asks him:
Did u see anything there that
u were not supposed to see?

Boy: yes, I saw dad!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:30:32 PM

Boy:I love u
Girl:Me too
Boy:Tum mujhe kitna pyar karti ho?
Girl:Jitna tum mujhe karte ho
Boy: U cheater..
main samjha tum waqai mujh se pyar karti ho€¦

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:32:52 PM

Lovers sitting in a park,
boy tries to kiss the girl..
Girl says No dear not all this before marriage..
Boy: Don€™t worry darling €I am already married€.:p

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:33:51 PM

Once there was a mirror which used to kill "LIERS"
FRENCH:I think I don't smoke (killed)
AMERICAN:I think, I love Iraq(killed)
PATHAN:I think (killed)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:34:17 PM

What is BUSINESS ?

Dad: I want u 2 marry a girl of my choice.
Son: No
Dad: The girl is Bill Gate's daughter.
Son: then Ok.

Dad goes o Bill Gates.
Dad: I want your daughter to marry my son.
Bill Gates: No
Dad: My son is the CEO of the World Bank.
Bill Gates: Than ok

Dad goes 2 the President of the World Bank.
Dad:Appoint my son as the CEO of your bank.
President:No
Dad:He is the son-in-law of Bill Gates.
President: Then OK

That's business...!!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:35:57 PM

Boy 2 God:
Give me a pocket full of money,
A job & a big vehicle full of girls.

God replied:your wish is fullfilled
&
He became a bus conductor of karachi university point.:p

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:36:29 PM

Man1 sitting with dog.
Man2:Your dog bits?
Man1:No
Man 2 sits and the dog bits!
Man2 angrily, you said he does not bit!
Man:That is not my dog.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:36:54 PM

Why were males created before females?

Because you alwas need
a rough draft before the final copy.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:37:14 PM

A lawyer saw an auto accident on street.
He rushed over and started handing out
business cards saying:
I saw the whole thing..
I will take either side

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:38:11 PM

The devils challenged
the angels to a game of cricket.

We have got all the cricketers, said the Angels.
Devils:No problem,
we have got all the umpires.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:38:38 PM

Boss:I will give you Rs.25 an hour starting today
and in 3 months, I will raise it to Rs.50 an hour.
When do you want to start?
New employee:In 3 months.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:38:57 PM

Teacher: Johny,
if your father earned $100,000
and gave half of it to your mother,
what would she have?

Little johny: A heart a attack

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:39:16 PM

If dentists make films,?the names will be -
*Daant ho na ho
*Jaanam brush karo
*Aa ab clean karen
*Kabhi teeth kabhi gum
*Humara daant aapke paas hai!:-)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:39:37 PM

Doc 2 Patient :
The check which u gave me has returned back.

Patient 2 Doc:The head-ache for which
you gave me medicine has also returned back.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:39:59 PM

Lab pe ati hai Dua ban k tamanna meri,
Dil karta he band krwa doon sim tere,

Dor duniya ka tere DAM se ujala hojaye,
Jo mjhe sms na kare Uska range kala HOjaye‚¦.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:40:26 PM

A Smile costs less than Electricity.
But.....
Gives more light !!
So Always Keep Smiling..... &
Prove that u're the Best TubeLight !!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:40:50 PM

Qualities a friend must have:
Cute as crocodile.
Smart as donkey.
Active as turtle.
Fit as hippo.
Matured as monkey.
Sincerity like dog.
No doubt you are my good friend

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:41:10 PM

2day i have not sent Sms 2 anybody Except U.
2day i have not thought about anybody Except U.
Because my policy is?
one day one fool.....!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:41:31 PM

Customer : How much is that banana for?

Salesperson : Rs.10

Customer : Can you sell it to me for Rs.6?

Salesperson : At that rate, you will only get the banana peel!

Customer : Okay I will buy the banana for Rs.4 , but you can keep the peel!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:42:35 PM

A boy came running in the kitchen,
Boy:Dad, There is an ugly monster at the door
Dad(Looking at his wife):
Tell him we have already got one!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:43:07 PM

A man was dying of cancer.
His son asked him:
dad why do you keep on telling
everyone that your dying of AIDS.

He replied:
"So that when i die no 1 will touch ur mom"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:43:29 PM

Repeat these lines at least 2 hours
everyday after Namaz outside the mosque
& u will b a millionare within few Months.
"Allah k naam par dey de baba"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:43:50 PM

In heaven together we were in a big hall.
An Angel told us to write our sins before going in,
but before l could start writing any thing
l heard you caling for ''EXTRA SHEET''.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:44:22 PM

Maths teacher asked JOHNY
"If u have 12 chocalate and u give 5 to DONA,
3 to ALICE and 4 to ROMA then wat will u get ?
JOHNY replied "Sir! 3 new girl friends".

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:44:47 PM

when wordz fail eyz works
when eyz fail heart works
when heart fails to kia ???
.
.
.
.
samajh le tapak gaya;)

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:45:09 PM

The brain is a wonderful organ.
It starts working the moment you get
up and does not stop until u get into the office...

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:45:31 PM

I Can SEE 'TEA' in A TEA-CUP
Can you SEE the WORLD in WORLD-CUP?

I can SING on Any STAGE
Can you SING in COMA-STAGE?

I can FIX my PASSPORT Size PHOTO in My PASSPORT
Can you FIX Your STAMP Size PHOTO in a STAMP?

I Can SEND My ADDRESS to Your MOBILE
Can You SEND Your MOBILE to my ADDRESS?

TRY ALL THIS........ ....
Atleast DO the LAST ONE.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:45:50 PM

Never kiss a police woman.
she ll say stop and handsup.
Never kiss a nurse she
will say next plz. Always kiss a teacher.
She ll repeat it 10 times.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:46:19 PM

Life is like a MOVIE...
If u r sad - DRAMA
If u r afraid - SUSPENSE
If u r angry - ACTION
When u look at the mirror - HORROR

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:47:04 PM

Once a husband and wife
were preparing to go office
and the wife thought
she would drive today for the office.

Wife : Chalo na car me kahin ghumne
chalte hai, aur car me drive karungi!

Huband : “Agar tum car drive karogi to
jayenge car mein, aayenge akhbaar mein‚!!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:49:22 PM

A pakistani man goes for fishing, catches a big fish.
Comes home and askks his wife to cookthe fish.
Wife says she can't as there is no gas, no electricity,
no atta(floor) and no cooking oil to fry it in.
Man goes and puts the fish back in the river.
Fish comes up to the surface and shouts
"Pakistan Zindabad"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:49:51 PM

A student was asked 2 write
a signboard 4 the traffic rules
near da college campus

He wrote:-

"Drive Carefully!
Don't kill the students,
wait for the Teachers"

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:50:10 PM

In pakistan survey was done:
How many girls want to meet with Saquib
Survey repot
5% says yes
0% says no
95% says kuhawab maat dikhao
Humari aise kismat kaha

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:50:36 PM

A
B
C
D

A-AATRACTIVE
B-BEST
C-CUTE
D-DEAR 2 ME

E
F
G

E-EXCELENT
F-funny
G-GOOD LOOKING

H
I
J

H- HA HA HA
I- I M
J- JOKING

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:51:55 PM

Think Big.
Think Positive.
Think Smart.
Think Beautiful.
Think Great.
I know, that is too much for u,
so here is a shortcut.
JUST THINK ABOUT ME!

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:52:18 PM

A Memon on his death time.

My wife, where r u ?
Wife:Yes, I'm here

My sons & daughters ru all here?
Yes, Papa

Memon:To phir brabar wale kamre
ka pankha Q khula hay ??? :D:D:D

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:52:39 PM

New style of proposing a girl:
I have spent many sleepless nights in ur love,
&
I don't want my son to do the same 4 your daughter,
So lets make them brother & sister.

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:53:04 PM

1 smile = 1 friendship
1 friendship = 1 love
1 love = 1 proposal
1 proposal = 1 marriage
And 1 marriage = THOUSANDS of problem.
so better think before you smile

Title: Re: FUNNY SMS
Post by: Global Angel on December 29, 2011, 10:53:23 PM

Roses r red,
violets r blue,
monkeys like you should be kept in the zoo.
Dont get angry,
you will find me there too,
not in the cage but laughing at you.
:D

FTC Forum

Entertainment => SMS & QUOTES => Topic started by: RemO on October 22, 2011, 06:51:30 PM